Kurze Inhaltsangabe
Was wird gewonnen und was geht verloren, wenn eine Frau sich entschliesst, ein Kind zu bekommen? In ihren späten Dreissigern, als die Freundinnen sich fragen, wann sie endlich Mutter werden, fragt Sheila Heti sich, ob sie es überhaupt werden will. In einer mehrere Jahre umspannenden Selbsterkundung, mal hierhin, mal dorthin gezogen von ihren Mitmenschen, ihrem Partner und den Verpflichtungen gegenüber ihren jüdischen Vorfahren, versucht sie eine weise und moralische Entscheidung zu treffen. Nachdem Philosophie, ihr Körper, die Mystik und der Zufall nicht geholfen haben, findet sie die Antwort viel näher bei sich. ( )

Go ahead and add me to the never-ending list of people who have read — and adored — “Motherhood” by Sheila Heti.

We follow the (often) relatable, inner-monologue of a late thirties woman as she navigates the possibility of being a mother, her perception of her own mother and grandmother, and attempts to understand the women in her life (near her own age) who are becoming mothers, alongside the dynamics of her romantic relationship and her creative career. As you can imagine it’s messy and poignant and sad, at times.

Much didn’t apply to me… and won’t to those who fall outside the categories of “want to have kids” and “don’t want to have kids” because this book isn’t about those who have no choice in their own motherhood. It’s more about the ways in which society and family use guilt and tradition to funnel women into certain lives, and choosing not to be a mother is deemed “less than”. But it never condemns motherhood vs not being a mother, or frames either as an absence of anything else, in a bad way.

Side note; I really liked the use of coin-flipping in the narrative, which is a device that added to the poetic flow and philosophical nature of the narrative.

Definitely recommend this one, it’s my favorite Sheila Heti, thus far. ( )

An unnamed woman in her late 30s goes back and forth trying to decide if she wants to have children or not. She is white, straight, a writer, and in a loving long-term relationship. Other characters come in and out of the narrative, but the book is essentially one long meandering diary entry with not much plot.

I loved the concept of this novel, but the execution wasn't to my taste. There are still too few novels that consider what it means to not automatically join the baby production line, and there are several moments of insight into this - the narrator talks about her mother and the women that came before her in particular, and what it might mean to choose not to carry on that line. She also discusses her partner's feelings on the subject - ambivalent at best, negative at worst. Still, the decision is hers to make, and there's much hand-wringing over whether or not to have a child before it's (biologically) too late.

The reason I only gave this 3.5 stars is partly that the endless oscillation became irritating towards the end, but also mostly that only the briefest of mentions is given to possibly one of the biggest reasons why women under a certain age are so conflicted about having children in the current age - climate change. I was extremely surprised that this didn't factor into the narrative more, bar a couple of mentions here and there, as I was definitely expecting this to be thoroughly explored. It felt like a gaping omission to not consider the climate crisis in depth in a work such as this, and has left me feeling a bit underwhelmed.

Still, the novel is an important step towards opening up the discussion within contemporary fiction around why a woman might decide not to have children. It won't be for everyone, but it does get you thinking. ( )

Difficult to rate this. Certainly as a man I found it illiuminating. As an older man in a long term marriage in which we have no kids, I wish I had read something like this before my late thirties. The book is certainly self indlugent and repititve with no real plot to speak of, yet I found it addicitve. I read it in 4 sittings which is really unusual for me. ( )

I was so resistant to reading this book, based on some reviews and my fear that it would be a tad too narcissistic for my taste. And it was quite narcissistic, but in a way I enjoyed, a way which took into account the wild swings of our thoughts about life and what is important to us. The narrator’s decision of whether or not to have a baby ultimately took a back seat to the examination of the question itself and why it occupies us (women) so much. ( )