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The Good Death: An Exploration of Dying in America

por Ann Neumann

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15226181,538 (4.14)3
"Following the death of her father, journalist and hospice volunteer Ann Neumann sets out to examine what it means to die well in the United States. If a good death exists, what does it look like? This question lies at the heart of Neumann's rigorously researched and intimately told journey along the ultimate borderland of American life: American death. From church basements to hospital wards to prison cells, Neumann charts the social, political, religious, and medical landscape to explore how we die today. The Good Death weaves personal accounts with a historical exploration of the movements and developments that have changed the ways we experience death. With the diligence of a journalist and the compassion of a caregiver, Neumann provides a portrait of death in the United States that is humane, beautifully written, and essential to our greater understanding of the future of end-of-life care"-- "If a good death exists, what does it look like? This question lies at the heart of SITTING VIGIL, a rigorously researched and intimately told journey along the ultimate borderland of American life: American death. From church basements to hotel lobbies, hospital wards to prison cells, journalist and hospice volunteer Ann Neumann charts contemporary society and political, religious, and medical culture to tell us how we die today. In 2005, Neumann left her job in New York City to care for her father who had been suffering from non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. She became a full-time caregiver--cooking, cleaning, and coordinating medications with hospice for three months in her hometown of Lancaster, Pennsylvania. When her father died, two days after Thanksgiving, she was undone by the experience, by the grief and visceral quality of death. It set Neumann on a course of research and investigation. Was her father's death a good death? Do others die this way? Is there a best way to die? SITTING VIGIL is the result of more than six years of hospice work, research, and examination into these questions and more. SITTING VIGIL deftly interweaves these personal accounts with a historical telling of the movements and developments that have changed the way we die, including the medical advancements that have altered the definition of death forever, patients' rights legislation, the prevalence of hospice and palliative care, Catholic hospitals that apply the Vatican's laws to a pluralistic society, the increasing successes of the Death with Dignity movement, health care reform, and the rise of excessive, ineffective medical treatment. SITTING VIGIL is the first book to survey the breadth and variation of death in America, and Neumann writes with engaging warmth, wit, and frank detail. "--… (más)
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Mostrando 1-5 de 27 (siguiente | mostrar todos)
Not entirely what I expected, though still compelling. And heartbreaking. I think this is a very good place to start for anyone trying to work on death acceptance. It reveals some practical knowledge, but mostly it forces the reader to face death through those who are dying, have died, and have outlasted death for now. It's not particularly uplifting, but neither is it devastating. ( )
  JessicaReadsThings | Dec 2, 2021 |
Esta reseña ha sido escrita por los Primeros Reseñadores de LibraryThing.
We are all going to die and everyone that we know and love is going to die, and it probably isn’t going to happen how we would like it to. Neumann’s book is a compelling, compassionate, and thoughtful examination of this proposition. Her discussion of what constitutes a good death (or a good enough death) is moving, and rather terrifying, but something that it would behoove all of us to think about. It is a really remarkable look at death in America. ( )
  eachurch | Jun 11, 2017 |
In The Good Death Ann Neumann examines death in America using her experience as a caregiver for her dying father as the springboard. She succeeds in looking both pragmatically and emotionally at what death is and what it isn't.

Unlike some memoirs on the topic of death this is not written specifically just to tell one person's death and the effect it has on others. Those books are wonderful for what they are but do not even try, understandably so, to "examine" death in America but rather to illustrate through a specific instance what death was like in a particular case. They usually present broader issues when they find themselves at odds with what they think is right and what they are or are not permitted to do. To the extent that this book does that it is relatively brief and is the origin point for a broader study.

I found the mixture of straightforward presentations of views and policies juxtaposed with more emotional tales of where those policies intersect with real people going through difficult times to be quite effective and moving. Those stories become not simply one person's battle isolated from the issues but emblematic of how policies and narrowly defined viewpoints impact many people fighting the same battle.

I would recommend this to anyone interested in death in both its emotional and its societal/legal/medical aspects. If you want something a bit more like a memoir where you follow one family and the larger issues are more like background, this may disappoint you. But fear not, there are plenty of such memoirs available and they can pack quite a punch. For those wanting the heart and the mind engaged together, this book will also pack quite a punch, and perhaps irritate you at some of the policies and viewpoints thrust on people when they are suffering already.

Reviewed from a copy made available by the publisher via Edelweiss. ( )
  pomo58 | Jun 1, 2017 |
Esta reseña ha sido escrita por los Primeros Reseñadores de LibraryThing.
This was both more interesting and less... depressing than I anticipated it would be. Not a “fun” book, exactly, but Neumann handles her difficult topic with sensitivity and grace. Delving into the subject of how Americans face death, Ann Neumann opens with the story of how she and her sister tried and failed to allow her father the at-home death he wanted. This is painful and personal, and Neumann doesn't shy from graphic detail, but neither does she “wallow.” Her frustration with the failure of the hospice that was serving her father to provide them with more complete information (not to mention stronger drugs) begins her on the exploration of death related issues that makes up the rest of the book. She becomes a hospice volunteer and works with patients in a variety of settings, coming to recognize the advantages and limitations of the system. She spends time with activists, and patients involved in the “aid in dying” movement, and examines the political and religious aspects of the opposition to this option. Looking at cases such as Terri Schiavo's, Nancy Cruzan's, and Jahi McMath's, she presents the debate over lengthy use of life support measures for patients ruled to be brain dead, and she points out ways in which DNR orders and living wills may be disregarded depending on issues outside the patient's control. In a chapter that was particularly eye-opening for me, she looks at death in America's prison system. The ending of this chapter, “Dying Inside,” was a little jarring, but also very honest – she admits that she's uncomfortable with the prisoner she visits, and is not sorry that the prison won't let her send him letters. I was shocked, though, to learn the extent to which the policies of our prison system are influenced by the large corporations that profit from them. But, back to death...

The book ends on a surprisingly life affirming note. Neumann forms a strong friendship with a hospice patient who far outlives the six month guideline, and her relationship with the woman and her family helps her come to terms with her father's difficult end. She says...
”There is no good death, I now know. It always hurts, both the dying and the left behind. But there is a good enough death. It is possible to look it in the face, to know how it will come, to accept its inevitability. Knowing death makes facing it bearable. There are many kinds of good enough death, each specific to the person dying. As they wish, as best they can. And there is really one kind of bad death, characterized by the same bad facts: pain, denial, prolongation, loneliness.”


I'm glad I read this. The political, social, and religious issues involved are ones that we as a nation need to address thoughtfully and seriously, weighing various issues of compassion and dignity, hope and suffering, which Neumann explores from a wide variety of perspectives.

I received this book from LibraryThing through their Early Reviewers program with the understanding that the content of my review would not affect my likelihood of receiving books through the program in the future. Many thanks to Beacon Press, Ann Neumann, and LibraryThing! ( )
  meandmybooks | Apr 29, 2017 |
Esta reseña ha sido escrita por los Primeros Reseñadores de LibraryThing.
Saying that this was an enjoyable book is inaccurate and feels a bit glib. So I guess that I will say that I found myself nodding my head, muttering 'uh huh, that's right' and agreeing with most of Ann Neumann's discussion of end of life issues, particularly aid in dying. She is clearly biased on the side of granting terminal patients the right to decide to end their suffering when they feel that they have had enough. And that's fine, because I totally agree with her.

I liked Neumann's inclusion of opposing points of view, in particular those of Bill Peace and the advocacy group Not Dead Yet. I had not realized that the disabled would consider the legalizing of the right to aid in dying to be a threat. Like Neumann, I now understand their position, even though I profoundly object to their belief that they know best for everyone because of how they have lived their lives with their various disabilities. (but I will not get into any of that)

I was quite interested in the different aspects of dying that Neumann covered, as well as all of the various settings and scenarios. She runs the gamut as she visits and speaks with people from all walks of life, from the poor AIDS patient in hospice, to the wealthy of New York, to terminally ill prison patients. She covers a lot of territory but it all seems to boil down to loneliness and a sense of isolation. In the end, she concludes that there is no such thing as a 'good death' but that there can be a 'good enough' death.

I don't know. From what I've seen, death is messy and chaotic. It is the ultimate interruption of life. It is horrifying. It is a profound relief. It is a loss of dignity and privacy. It is a time of reflection, memories and general woolgathering. It is a time of regret and amends. It is too quick. It is too slow. Ann Neumann knows what I mean.

Thank you to LibraryThing for the Early Reviewers copy of this title. ( )
  enemyanniemae | Apr 20, 2017 |
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Chapter One
Terminal Restlessness

I place the tiny, white pill on the US Army spoon my father had used to eat cereal for nearly forty years. From a white plastic bottle, about the size and shape of a small flask, I extracted five drops of pink liquid morphine. I release each drop one by one onto the spoon and used the tip of the dropper to push the Ativan in slow circles until it dissolved. Then I sucked the mixture back up into the dropper. Morphine takes your pain away. Ativan calms you down. I wanted to lick the spoon.
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"Following the death of her father, journalist and hospice volunteer Ann Neumann sets out to examine what it means to die well in the United States. If a good death exists, what does it look like? This question lies at the heart of Neumann's rigorously researched and intimately told journey along the ultimate borderland of American life: American death. From church basements to hospital wards to prison cells, Neumann charts the social, political, religious, and medical landscape to explore how we die today. The Good Death weaves personal accounts with a historical exploration of the movements and developments that have changed the ways we experience death. With the diligence of a journalist and the compassion of a caregiver, Neumann provides a portrait of death in the United States that is humane, beautifully written, and essential to our greater understanding of the future of end-of-life care"-- "If a good death exists, what does it look like? This question lies at the heart of SITTING VIGIL, a rigorously researched and intimately told journey along the ultimate borderland of American life: American death. From church basements to hotel lobbies, hospital wards to prison cells, journalist and hospice volunteer Ann Neumann charts contemporary society and political, religious, and medical culture to tell us how we die today. In 2005, Neumann left her job in New York City to care for her father who had been suffering from non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. She became a full-time caregiver--cooking, cleaning, and coordinating medications with hospice for three months in her hometown of Lancaster, Pennsylvania. When her father died, two days after Thanksgiving, she was undone by the experience, by the grief and visceral quality of death. It set Neumann on a course of research and investigation. Was her father's death a good death? Do others die this way? Is there a best way to die? SITTING VIGIL is the result of more than six years of hospice work, research, and examination into these questions and more. SITTING VIGIL deftly interweaves these personal accounts with a historical telling of the movements and developments that have changed the way we die, including the medical advancements that have altered the definition of death forever, patients' rights legislation, the prevalence of hospice and palliative care, Catholic hospitals that apply the Vatican's laws to a pluralistic society, the increasing successes of the Death with Dignity movement, health care reform, and the rise of excessive, ineffective medical treatment. SITTING VIGIL is the first book to survey the breadth and variation of death in America, and Neumann writes with engaging warmth, wit, and frank detail. "--

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