4.25

Idk what this genre is. I love it.

I’m pretty sure this might be my first or second book in this genre.

This was laugh out loud funny and so fun ( )

tbh i didn’t actually finish this book. i dnf’d at page 174. i don’t like smut and i definitely should’ve known better and idk maybe not read a book notorious for being smut lol. but alas i was drawn in by the cute cover and the fun premise. jokes on me. (i promise i dont just complain about the smut btw lol) i tried to just read through the smut anyway because at first the plot was engaging and the characters were fun to follow. but it got to a point where i just wasn’t interested in the story enough anymore to grit and bear it through the constant smut. like it was a little much. even acotar wasn’t this bad in terms of casual smut every 2 pages. at least there you could generally skip it and be fine. but with this it was like just casually weaved into random parts that you had no way to skip over.

ok enough kvetching about smut. we all know what it is lmao. and like no judgement if that’s your thing that’s so valid my dude. it’s just not my thing. anyway. characters. at first i absolutely loved Mariel. she was charming and goofy and sweet and relatable. but eventually she started to get kind of annoying. like ok we get it, you’re amazing and powerful with a sacred connection to plants and the natural world (that i’m jealous of lolol) but you don’t know it and ur family sucks. omg she’s not like other gorls🤪 and at first i liked her relationship with Ozroth a lot. but imo the slow-burn just wasn’t slow-burning right. it jumped from hatred to lust and feelings way WAY too fast. and then stayed in lustiness with no movement for too long. all of the characters were incredibly cliche to the point where it started to get annoying. i really tried to give them a chance but eventually hearing about Calladia’s powder blue lulu lem— i mean workout set— and her glowing muscles started to become pretty whatever and Themmie’s quirky social media presence literally isn’t a thing like stop why do people keep trying to make that trope happen??? i thought we as a society agreed to get over that after 2017??? and don’t even start me with the exotic rich parents where the mom is clinically insane with zero boundaries or self awareness and the dad is just kinda there? and allegedly loves his wife but no one can understand why. the characters are all a little too conveniently built but still not dynamic enough for it to be ok. ( the exception is Alzapraz. LOVE that guy. an absolute legend. ) also what happened to Mariel’s therapist?? it was mentioned she had one once in the beginning but never again? or at least up until page 174. i thought that would’ve been so interesting and refreshing and satisfying to see a character going through therapy. imagine the growth and positive change we could’ve seen in Mariel if she’d just done a little DBT.

the environment was also a little too perfect. id love to see some more variation in the environment. it’s just too perfect and convenient. as much as i absolutely love love love that kind of fantasy world and wish i could live in Glimmer Falls myself, it’s just not that realistic. we needed more history and variety. no place is ever just that conveniently perfect. and using magic as the answer to everything is well…i dare say…lazy? i hate that word. so please forgive me. but idk like, really?? there are SO many ways Glimmer Falls’ perfection could be explained that would be interesting and exciting and thought provoking. but “magic runs through everything bc of the witches and mythical creatures”? idk. it’s giving Disney’s Dreamlight Valley (don’t get me wrong love that game but you know what i mean hopefully).

despite all the negative i’ve said, there are still things i liked. i still really like the premise. i think it’s interesting and i’m really curious to know what happens with the deal between Mariel and Oz. Especially with Oz’s mentor situation. it’s a strange situation that i haven’t seen anyone explore much before. i really like the idea of navigating that loophole. it’s very creative and unique and witty! I also really like the way the demon plane and society were built and explained. id LOVE to explore more of that. gimme a (smut free) book about that or somethin. give us a prequel about Oz’s upbringing. sold. take my money. yes. oh and like i said before. ✨Alzapraz✨the legend, the king, the icon. id love a book of his story.

tldr: i seriously could’ve done without the mention of demon d🤡ck every couple pages and the plot and characters dwindled too much for me to keep reading through the smut. If it was rewritten without the constant smut or even as fade to black, i would absolutely give it another try. but please, for the love of Hecate, make the characters and environment more dynamic. except for Alzapraz, he is perfect.

edit: after reading some of the reviews i can confidently say i am SO happy i didn't finish this book. the more i think about the faults and failures of this book, the more pissed off i get. just like what everyone else said, every trope you can possibly imagine was thrown in but NONE of them were done right. it's like the author got this awesome idea for the premise but then rushed the process so much just to get the idea out into the world that it just sucked as a result. no thought went into what was actually important for the novel to be stable (with or without tropes). also, everyone is absolutely right, the main characters and friends seem far more like teenagers or people in their early 20s. definitely not someone in their late 20's reaching 30. ALSO so many of the things that were supposed to be funny were really just insufferable and extremely awkward to read. most involved the mom. also why did the mom have to be in SO many scenes??? it was awful and i felt emotionally tired after reading her scenes. i literally had to close the book for a few hours after on multiple occassions. i thought some of the renaming of popular things were funny in an ironic way where it was so stupid it was a little funny (eg. my alchemical bromance, pixtagram, bumbelina...) but then i realized...i was supposed to be laughing with the author, not at. it was so stupid that i thought the fact that it was stupid was funny. if that makes sense. i always hate when books and tv shows/movies try to be relatable to modern society by making puns out of current things. its so cringe. it hurts. and in this case, talk about lazy writing. and lastly -just guessing based on the cover of the book, i have not read it- is it true that the sequel is about Calladia falling in love with that blondie demon mentor guy? because if so then COME ON DUDE. also just saw that the third book is called "a wearwolf's guide to seducing a succubus"...no...im out.......goodbye...

edit 2: there was SO much potential with the whole “demon gets a soul on accident” thing. but instead of exploring it to the fullest, the author chose to primarily focus on his newfound romantic and lusty feelings. like ok the demon plane is a surprisingly chill place but Oz was denied that from a young age so he could be a bargainer. it would make sense to explore that more. maybe his new human soul makes him jealous or makes him feel betrayed that he wasn’t able to have the good things that other demon children got? or how about how him suppressing his human feelings will lead to depression like it does for most humans? it’s like the reverse of the Bechdel Test lmao poor Ozroth is out here only being allowed to exist and feel as it pertains to Mariel. that’s not interesting or fair to the character. oh and don’t even start me on how all of the supporting characters are just plot devices for the world revolve even more around Mariel.

ps i find it amusing that she dedicated this book to her parents ( )

Mariel keeps trying to live up to her mother's expectations but she keeps failing at the tasks her mother sets for her. Her mother is very powerful, both as a witch and within the local community. The latest accident that Mariel makes happen is a summoned demon; he's supposed to trade for her soul but there are complications, including the fact that if she loses her soul she loses her magic.
Ozoroth can't leave her until she gives him her soul and that forced proximity is not helping either of them. To add to the situation someone is planning a development that is going to damage part of the natural beauty of the surrounding area. Her mother is in favour of the development but she's not sure.
It was a fun read with characters who seemed to have fun with each other and her friends are serious ride or die friends and I suspect that sequels will feature them (hopefully) ( )

This book is absolutely delightful! It is definitely a bit predictable at points (it's a romance novel, that's part of the charm), but it's still fun. I loved Mariel and Oz's unconditional support of each other, as well as the fact that Mariel's friends are totally ride or die. The book made me laugh out loud several times at various parts, and the sex scenes are very steamy. Hawley's writing style is absolutely phenomenal. I really want to return to Glimmer Falls and read the rest of the series now! ( )

A Witch’s Guide to Fake Dating a Demon
Glimmer Falls, Book 1

I Picked Up This Book Because: #Scarathlon/ finally available on LIbby.

Media Type: Audiobook
Source: R Public Library
Dates Read: 10/17/23 - 10/20/23
Stars: 4
Narrator(s): Helen Laser

The Characters:

Mariel Spark
Ozroth the Ruthless
Mariel’s two besties, an overbearing mother, fairly absent while present father and a quirky several times great grandfather

The Story:

This is my first book from this author, and it will not be my last. It was everything I love about characters in a story. Oz and Mariel were super cute together. I loved Mariel’s friends and how they supported her. I had a great time in Glimmer falls and can’t wait to go back.

The Random Thoughts: ( )