damn this one is just a great book about addiction that dips in & out of the grunge scene & really gives life to the era. little long at the end & also somehow devolves into a dog memoir lol. i'm not sure if schemel wrote this with a ghostwriter, but it's one of the best-written memoirs i've ever read by a musician. just the right amount of funny, talky, sappy. totally real. ( )

This memoir of Patty Schemel's life includes her friendship with Kurt Cobain, playing in the band Hole, her drug addiction and homelessness, and growing up as a lesbian. I've been surprised how many rock biographies, particularly dealing with drug addiction, seem so boring and devoid of insight. This is definitely not the case with Schemel's book. I had a difficult time putting it down! ( )

David Johansen of the New York Dolls likened an addict’s existence to the film Groundhog Day. The incessant quest for drugs, to the exclusion of all else, makes every day exactly like the one(s) before it. He was referring specifically to his bandmate, Johnny Thunders, but he could just as easily have been describing the life of former Hole drummer, Patty Schemel.

I love a good rock memoir. I’ll take a pass on recent bestsellers by big stars, like Keith Richards, Dylan or Springsteen, instead opting for the story of a supporting player or some underground/cult band. Unlike an autobiography, a memoir tends to focus on one aspect of a person’s life and Schemel’s is definitely the story of her addiction. If you’re looking for detailed remembrances of touring, gigs, recording sessions, interviews, photo shoots and award ceremonies, you really won’t find that here. While there are references to all of those things, they’re filtered through the lens of someone who could barely appreciate any of it because the need for alcohol, then heroin and, ultimately, crack cocaine is always first and foremost in her mind. There’s very little glamour to be found in this book and I’m sure that’s intentional. It’s a truly frightening story, and fascinating in so far as I hadn’t realized the human body could endure so much abuse and still come out the other side relatively unscathed. And, thankfully, make it out she eventually does, but be patient, dear reader, she takes you on one long, hellish journey [until nearly the end of the book’s 270 pages] before she finds redemption.

In a twisted kind of way, this was an entertaining read. I wasn’t all that into music in the 1990’s so I was not aware of how many accomplished and still productive artists came out of that Pacific Northwest scene. Mark Lanegan, members of Alice in Chains, Screaming Trees, Pearl Jam, Soundgarden and Built to Spill, among others, all make brief appearances at clubs, in shared rehearsal spaces and/or on the sofa of the local drug dealer. Not to mention, of course, Kurt Kobain and Courtney Love, grunge’s answer to Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor, with all their personal drama.

After I finished the book, I sought out the documentary of the same name, which was made in 2012. It doesn’t go into nearly as much minute detail regarding the extent of Schemel’s addictions, but it does show more of her personality, which doesn’t come across at all in the book. Pity, because she seems like a really cool person. Someone in the documentary refers to her as one of the funniest people they ever met…well, I got absolutely no sense of that from the book. Courtney Love, on the other hand, really leaps off the page. Despite the fact that her appearances in the story are somewhat limited and fairly brief, her fierce intelligence and biting wit create a breath of fresh air in an otherwise fairly claustrophobic tale. No matter your opinion of Love, it really illustrates why some people become stars.

This is a gripping story, but not for the faint of heart. My only complaint is with the final chapter which feels more like an inspirational speech than the resolution to such a harrowing ordeal. But far be it for me to take away something so hard earned. Recommended. ( )