J. L. Clayton

Both the premise and the cover grabbed my attention. It sounds really fascinating (even though it gives a nod to the Twilight series).

There are several issues with this book, however. The first is the voice of the main character. Her thoughts were all over the place, and she repeated thoughts and ideas frequently. On one hand, it really made her character distinctive and realistic, in a way. But on the other hand, it didn't work well for a narrative. I found myself getting agitated over her thoughts and frequent use of "crap".

And, it's not a good thing when the character realizes this is an issue. Charlie once thought, "If you could live in my head, trust me, you would pack up and move the heck out. My mind was not a fun place to be."

Unfortunately, the readers do live in her head for the length of the book. Her spastic way of thinking did make reading difficult.

Tense slips and spelling also provided bumps in reading.

Organization-wise, I really didn't understand why there were chapters in Crispus' POV when the main story was first person for Charlie. Chapters in another character's POV really only works with 3rd person.

There are also good things about this book. Every now and again, I would come across fantastic sentences, such as:

"His hair was a messy silky blond color. His eyes were shaped like crescent moons in a pool of dark blue."

I have trouble imagining a hair color being messy silky, but that aside, the image is great and the sentences are comparatively better than others.

The plot was interesting enough to hold my attention. A majority of the story stayed with the mundane. For instance, there was a single chapter dedicated to Charlie being driven to school for her first day. Banter and character building is excellent to do, but it should be balanced with plot. Their conversations weren't interesting enough to have a chapter all their own.

Overall, if you enjoy fiction with sparse fantasy elements, this is for you. The story really doesn't pick up until the end. Due to the cliff-hanger ending, I may read the second book of the series. If you are interested, the second book can be found on Amazon. It was free, so I've already snatched it up.… (más)