The advice in this book is clear and simple. It also repeats some information. It comes from a Christian perspective without being heavy handed. (It mostly consists of quotes from the Bible at the start of each chapter.)

There are suggested steps in and at the end of each chapter.

Workbook One
What are the different attachment styles, and which one do you think you have?
1. Take a few minutes to reflect on your relationships with close friends and family members, and consider how you typically respond to them.
2. Are there any negative patterns in your current relationships that you can trace back to childhood experiences? Try to identify the underlying attachment needs that might be driving these patterns.
3. Consider someone in your life who has a different attachment style than you. How does their behavior in relationships differ from your own, and how can you adapt your communication style to better understand and support them?

Workbook Two
1. Which attachment style resonates with you the most, and why? Try to identify a past or current relationship that supports this attachment style.
2. Reflect on a recent disagreement or misunderstanding you had with someone close to you. Did your attachment style play a role in how you responded or reacted? If so, how?

Workbook Three
1. Take a moment to reflect on your attachment style and identify at least one way it has influenced your interactions with others.
2. Think of a past relationship or friendship that didn’t work out. How did your attachment style contribute to the dynamic of the relationship?
3. Identify a positive characteristic of someone with a different attachment style than yours. How can you appreciate and learn from their approach to relationships?

Chapter 4: Fixing Your Attachment Style

How to Change Your Attachment Style - Full Guide
1. Identify your current attachment style
2. Identify your triggers
3. Practice self-compassion
4. Develop a positive self-image
5. Practice healthy communication
6. Seek therapy
(My opinion of therapy gets lower every year with seeing the limited effectiveness in the lives of therapists who write books, and from my own experience. I have read, and also believe that a caring friend is of more benefit than a professional.)
7. Practice healthy attachment behaviors

“There’s hope for transforming your attachment style, and the critical ingredient that might surprise you? Self-compassion. That’s right, showing kindness and understanding to yourself is not just a feel-good practice; it can rewire your brain and transform your attachment patterns.”

“Kind self-talk is one practice that will help you develop self-compassion. It involves treating yourself with the same kindness you offer to your loved ones. The idea of being kind to oneself is not new, and it has been studied in the context of mindfulness-based interventions for many years.”

Workbook Four
1. What are some of the practical steps you can take to transition from an insecure to a secure attachment style?
2. Think about a specific relationship in your life. How might changing your attachment style positively impact that relationship?

(It is interesting that this chapter gave one set of advice regardless of the person’s attachment style.)

Chapter 5: Overcoming Jealousy and Insecurity - Dealing with Anxiety and Avoidance

Workbook Five
1. Which of the specific strategies outlined in this chapter for overcoming jealousy and insecurity in relationships do you think would work best for you?
2. Have you ever experienced anxiety or avoidance in a relationship? How did you handle it, and what could you have done differently with the knowledge from this chapter?
3. Think about a relationship in your life that you would like to improve. How might the tools and exercises in this chapter help you work towards that goal?

Part Three: Further Healthy Practices

Chapter 6: Overcoming Codependency and Improving Interdependence

“However, as time passed, Lila realized she had become enmeshed in Max’s life. She constantly worried about him, trying to fix his problems and sacrificing her needs to meet his. She had become codependent, a pattern of behavior in which someone excessively relies on another person for their emotional or physical well-being.”

The term codependent is often bandied around. This paragraph seems to me to encapsulate a reasonable definition. “She constantly worried about him, trying to fix his problems and sacrificing her needs to meet his.”

Another definition might be: The “healthier” person is more concerned about the problem, than the owner of the problem.

The Webster IOS app puts it this way:
“: a psychological condition or a relationship in which a person manifesting low self-esteem and a strong desire for approval has an unhealthy attachment to another often controlling or manipulative person (such as a person with an addiction to alcohol or drugs)”

“Codependency is a behavioral and emotional pattern that is prevalent in many types of relationships (Meek, 2022). It is characterized by a person’s excessive reliance on others to meet their emotional and physical needs. Codependent individuals often feel a strong need to take care of others, often to the detriment of their own well-being (Gilbert, 2020).”

Chapter 7: Tips for Cultivating Healthy Relationships

“if you find yourself attracting the wrong kind of people into your life, it might be time to take a closer look at your attachment style and see if there are any changes you can make. Here are some tips that can help you attract the right people.”
1. Be yourself
2. Identify your values
3. Pursue your interests
4. Practice positivity “Positive energy is contagious, and cultivating a positive attitude can be a magnet for attracting the right people.”
5. Be open-minded
6. Communicate effectively
7. Set boundaries (The definition of boundaries here seems to be more limited than that found in other works. “Saying No” is the main point about boundaries in this book. Also, setting boundaries is “healthy”, but I don’t see it as attracting the right kind of people. Rather is seems like a strategy to not attract the wrong kind of relationships.)

My wife and I found a similar book, [b:Attachment Theory Workbook for Couples: Exercises to Strengthen and Grow Your Relationship|60716064|Attachment Theory Workbook for Couples Exercises to Strengthen and Grow Your Relationship|Elizabeth Gillette|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1648579455l/60716064._SX50_.jpg|95722324] to be more meaningful for us. Your mileage may differ. They were both available as loans from “Kindle Unlimited.” ( )