Some of my views in this review may be controversial, and I ask that you respect my personal experience before considering commenting.


Originally posted on Just Geeking by.

Content warnings:
The author lists the following warnings on her website: mentions of abuse, gaslighting, PTSD responses, violence, gore, mentions of kidnapping, murder, spiders, cults. There is no animal death, though there are some large monster deaths. There is no sexual violence on page, but there are discussions about how the media portrays abusive relationships, and mentions of violence against women in relation to that.

My additional warnings:

The topic of grief and trauma are ongoing themes throughout. Some trauma is a result of abusive relationships for several characters, and while the abuse does not happen in the book, there are discussions about abuse on page. Some that are almost theoretical in nature as one of the characters works through their own thoughts (I discuss this in my review) and the way this is framed may be triggering.

There are scenes discussing children being sold to traffickers and a scene showing a nightmare creature that has been sold into slavery as a pet. The theme of corruption, especially of government officials, runs throughout this book.

Please note that this review discusses the topic of abuse. The section of the review discussing this topic is hidden behind a spoiler tag, so it can be read or avoided as needed. If commenting on this topic, please put a trigger warning at the top of your comment. Thank you ( )

In a world where people can literally turn into that which they fear the most (i.e. their worst nightmare), corruption and lawlessness run amuk, as one might expect. Nineteen year old Vanessa Near (Ness) lives in such a city, Newham, which is one of the worst. Because her father was slaughtered by her sister when she turned into a giant spider, Ness is terrified that either she herself could become a Nightmare, or anyone in close proximity to her could become one and attack and kill her. "It's hard to stop being afraid when the whole world is literally full of monsters." If she had her way, she would hide in her little closet of a room at the Friends of the Restful Soul, which is definitely not a cult (or so she keeps telling everyone) and never leave. Unfortunately for her, the director at the not-a-cult is threatening to kick her out because of this. She volunteers to take a mail delivery trip (mail and packages need to be delivered in person because they will most likely get stolen otherwise), and this one decision changes her whole life. First, she meets a Nightmare (an adorable vampire by the name of Cy) and becomes locked out on deck with him, which, of course, sets off her Nightmare-phobia. As if that is not enough, the boat is blown to smithereens and she must rely on Cy to save her life, and not eat her in the process. It turns out, Cy doesn't want to be a Nightmare any more than Ness wants him to be one, and he fights his very nature every single day. When Cy and Ness realize that they are the only two survivors of the explosion, they race against time to find out how the boat exploded, and why.

Ness isn't your stereotypical heroine by any stretch of the imagination, and she would be the first to tell you this. She's scared of her own shadow, would much rather hide from a problem than confront it, and can't fight to save her life. But what she is, is determined. She's determined to find out if she was a target of the explosion or an innocent bystander (assassinations are commonplace in Newham and can happen for any reason at all), and she's determined to get her little closet sized room back! Cy is just as determined as Ness to find out if he was the target, and there are actually lots of reasons as to why he might have been, and if so, by whom.

The world building was very well done here. You really got the feeling of corruption and general weariness of just living through another day, but making the best of things. The characters were well written and Ness especially had some pretty serious character growth over the course of the book. It was interesting watching her come out of her shell little by little, usually drawn out by Cy, who was very emotionally vulnerable himself. They definitely brought out the best in each other.

All in all, I enjoyed this book very much and look forward to seeing where the next book in the series takes us.

5/5 stars.

*** I would like to thank NetGalley, HarperCollins Children's Books, and Rebecca Schaeffer for the opportunity to read and review this book. ( )