Rose MambertReseñas

" I’m definitely not going to tell you that everyone ought to read this but I found enough to really enjoy."
read more: http://likeiamfeasting.blogspot.gr/2014/09/narcissus-is-dreaming-rose-mambert.ht...

This was a good collection of stories centered on what happens after the happily ever after event in fairy tales.

Some of my favorite stories were:

"The Spyder" where Ms Muffet gets revenge on the spider by using the Dark Arts.

"A Wolf's Guide to the Fairy Tale" which is a self help guide for the Big Bad Wolf to capturing and successfully eating Little Red Riding Hoods.

"Snovhit" where the prince finds out that Snow White is not herself after being brought back from the Dead and has to work with the Dwarfs in order to cage her to protect his kingdom.

And my most favorite story of the collection, "What Makes Them Tick" about a Psychologist whose clients are all characters out of fairy tales and some of those sessions.

A quick and entertaining read.

This was painful. Look, it's a small-press anthology, and my expectations were really essentially for something that would be all right, maybe cute, mostly forgettable, and I was hoping to be pleasantly surprised. That this came down on the disappointing still, despite these limited expectations, is unfortunate, I'd say. I'm glad that the people who contributed to this sounded like they were having fun, and I think some of the pieces may have been improved with some more revision and work, but some of them (Elvis was the heir to an elf kingdom? The real provenance of fairy dust?) were probably never going to go anywhere, and others probably maxed out the limited value of the particular stories they wanted to tell. There are a couple of good stories in here; I liked To Kill the Oak King, for example. But that said, it's hard to tell if that story was good in its own right, or if it was good in the context of the other stories around it.

I don't like going on and ripping books when I don't feel I have anything intelligent to say about them that I can't sum up easily, so let's leave it at this: I would be remarkably surprised if it turned out this wasn't the worst book I read this year. I wish these people luck in the future, but there it is.

Anthologies have pros and cons, the major pros is that among many authors it’s more likely everyone will find at least few stories they like. In this case my personal favour goes to Mike Dies at the End (A Parody) by W2, for me this story is worthy of a full novel and I really hope the author will consider to expand it. And even if it has not an usual happily ever after, not at all, The Golem of Rabbi Loew by Johnny Townsend confirms me that I really like this author. Other favorites are Fools in Love by Chelsea Crowley, Super Love by Chris Helton, Starpoint Rendezvous by E. Craig McKay and Color Zap! By Sam Sommer. But in general, all the stories are more than above the average.

Incubus Ex by Ashley-Renee Cribbins: a sweet and little creepy tale about a 16 years old boy, Austin, half jealous half scared of her sister’s boyfriend, Sully. 18 years old sister is leaving for college and she wants to break with his boyfriend, but it’s not that simple, Sully is an incubus, and if she doesn’t do something to “trap” him, he will be able to reach her. Once the trick is done, only Austin can undo it, and night after night Sully comes to Austin to ask for his freedom… only that Austin is starting to understand how “useful” an incubus can be to a 16 years old boy. At first it seemed Austin was not gay, but I appreciated the little insight on his dreams the author gave us, so that it’s not at all unexpected the development of his relationship with Sully… not unexpected but nevertheless funny.

Mike Dies at the End (A Parody) by W2: all right, first of all this had me laughing in a moment when I shouldn’t have (read while there were too many people around me who had wanted to know why I was laughing…), when you will arrive to the “lie back and think of England”, you will understand why. This story is a funny romp, a satire about the usual ghost hunting stories; it remembers me a little that tv fiction where two buddy friends open a PI firm specialized in paranormal activities. Jason is gay, Mike is straight, but Jason is also single and Mike is “generous”, and so he let Jason have sex with him; but this situation cannot last long, and with the help of some very close friends, Jason will find his match in goth guy Ty. All of them Mike, Jason and Ty are really young, and so the feeling is that of a frat boys story with a paranormal twist. Very, very nice.

Monsters So Fair by Lyle Blake Smythers: after two stories more or less on the funny side, this one instead border on drama (if not being totally immersed in it). It’s a fantasy tale about a false prince Agib and a beautiful young man, Droo. The prophecy said that Agib will kill Droo, but when they meet each other, to Agib seems impossible that he will be the assassin of such innocent boy; and so instead of war they make love, but the morning looms upon them.

The Song by Rob Rosen: simple and romantic, even if with a little aftertaste of horror, exactly like the old fairy tales, this is a retelling of the little mermaid, but I will give you a tip, the ending is different. A young man is searching for a treasure, but he will find something more important and for sure more lasting than gold.

Dark Entries by Michael C. Thompson: 1 night and 1 day of nightmare; Lawrence and Jon are a couple already facing an imminent wreck. Both of them on heavily drugs, they are no more able to distinct between nightmare and reality. And in the end there will be no distinction between nightmare and reality.

Welcome to Anteaterland by Nathaniel Fuller: not sure how I feel about this story, I think there is an hidden meaning I didn’t fully catch, maybe something related to the monotony of life and how you have to take risks to be happy; but the man in this story took a pretty big risk when he came out to his wife, when he decided to enter in a long term relationship with a man and building a modern family with him and his son. Actually I think their life was pretty good, and even if the sex became routine, for them it was still good. So I’m not sure, it’s not that in the end they are not still together, but sincerely I preferred the way they were before.

Blood Sugar Sex Magic by Georgina Li: there is a story, but I think the main purpose of the author was to give the reader like flash of images more than a linear story; Billy, James and Mike and their journey from night to day, who will love who, who will remain with whom. James reads messages everywhere, but are those messages real or instead is James’s sensibility that gives him that “power”? And the messages are sending him in the right direction or not?

Baker Boy by Thomas Fuchs: I think this is an allegory on the lure of the seven sins, Gluttony, Fornication, Avarice, Pride, Wrath, Vainglory, Acedia, even if the poor guy of the story doesn’t really behave as a greed or irate man; but gluttony, lust, pride, vainglory and sloth are all symptoms he will experiment once he will meet Baker Boy, temptation all around.

The Zombissager by Colleen Chen: after a set of more dark stories, Zombissager goes back to the funny and light, even if in an horror set; Awesomeman and Coolman are superheroes and boyfriends, and they have to save the world from a threat made by a lot of zombie-dildos a crazy scientist put on the market… I think you can catch this is not exactly a “serious” horror plot, and our two superheroes will easily overcome the villain… or maybe not.

Shudder by Alice Fox: a graphic novel about a ghost minstrel and the proud knight that will help him with some little trouble he has with demons. Of course the proud knight will obtain the favors of the lady… ops of the minstrel in exchange of his efforts.

Mondeval’s Heart by Rose Mambert: I liked this story, it has not perhaps a sure happily ever after but at least is not without hope; it’s a fantasy tale about two unlikely companions, a demon and a human. No one aside from Ash has Tamaril’s trust, and as a loyal pet, Tamaril is willing to do everything to protect Ash, even losing his only chance to be normal again. I think it was a great demonstration of love, and I hope the author was only giving us a taste of something more, that in her mind there is a whole novel where Tamaril and Ash can find a place where they are not a demon and a human, but simply two men in love.

Zombie Hunt by Danielle Renn: more horror than romance, it’s probably a classic zombie tale, and if you know what I mean, then probably you are more ready than me to the future that is expecting zombie James Hunt and his human lover Evan. I know you cannot always have a perfectly happily ever after, and for sure not in an apocalyptic world were humans are living as captives, but still Evan’s love for Hunt was so tender I really felt for them and their fate.

The Hollow Hills of New Hampshire by Frank Muse: funny horror tale about a young gay man who find himself the “owner” of a brownie, that, if you didn’t know, is not a pastry, but a 3 feet tall domestic elf with highly specialized housekeeping skills. The dream of every gay man? Well not exactly when the survival of such elf depends on you having an heir and you have no interest in women at all…

This Won’t Hurt a Bit by Thomas Kearnes: two possible wrong lovers and two possible right lovers, but of course the narrative voice has to do the wrong choice before realizing that he is probably letting go his future. While there is one of those men that I see heading towards destruction, there is a spark of hope for the other two to build something good and nice. While the previous stories are about “fake” horror themes like zombie and trolls, this is about a the “real” horror of domestic violence.

The Golem of Rabbi Loew by Johnny Townsend: a bittersweet story set in a XVI century Prague about an old rabbi who finds the love of his life in the arms of a golem; or maybe the golem was simply a poor man who was not as educated as the rabbi but who has an heart bigger than any normal man, an heart that he was willing to sacrifice for the good of the people who gave him everything when he had nothing. This is yet another of the stories for which it’s more than worth to give this anthology a chance.

Fools in Love by Chelsea Crowley: Horatio is a little snobbish and Gus is a little too friendly… well it’s expected if you consider Horatio is the wizard in a fantasy court where Gus is the fool. Horatio has never considered Gus too much until the day he finds himself the joke of the other man, and I think that was exactly the purpose of the fool. This is a sweet and funny tale, no angst no drama, a little breath of fresh air in a mostly dark anthology.

Super Love by Chris Helton: funny, sweet and tender, this is just a day in the life of Maddex and his superhero boyfriend Greg. It’s like every ordinary couple, with Greg always out called for some emergency and Maddex at home, but like any other half of a clever couple, Maddex will understand that to make their relationship work, he has to share as much as possible of his boyfriend’s life.

Starpoint Rendezvous by E. Craig McKay: a sci-fi short story about two “businessmen” Simon and Jeremy, who not only share a business but also a bed. At the beginning of the story Simon and Jeremy are enjoying the offering of a sex resort but financial troubles are out there waiting them, and they need to find a way to make their business work so that also their relationship will grow to a level of comfort that allow them to retire. But when the moment is there, the thrill of the adventure is a too potent lure to resist.

Color Zap! By Sam Sommer: in a male future society were man with man can procreate thank to “genofacility” structure it’s no more an issue being gay, but there is still a way to being a misfit; Spencer is born with blue hair and his boyfriend Gavin has green hair. They are considered freaks and they find comfort in each other. And like all young men with a dream they will find a way to fight for their freedom.

http://www.amazon.com/dp/0982991339/?tag=elimyrevandra-20

I like small presses - some of them have distinctive voices, some of them simply print whatever their editors like. But in all cases they give chances to authors that cannot or would not sign with a big publisher. And a lot of the small presses will publish short stories anthologies - it is easier to try to please more readers with different stories from different authors than to try to publish the next big novel.

So when I saw that book in the Early Reviewers list, I decided to give it a try - small press, anthology (and I love reading short fiction), fantasy - I had picked up books for less reasons than that. And when I got the book and started reading it, I had quite low expectations - I like this type of anthologies but the quality is rarely great so I had learned not to expect too much.

Unfortunately the problems start even before the stories - implying that fantasy is not mature reading and the explanation about what they decided to print is weird. In a bad way. That's a new press -- alienating everyone is a bad idea. There is NO mention anywhere what any of the editors consider good literature (besides the dedication to Tolkien... even though the way it is done it sounds more like an attempt of a witty line that matches the anthology theme than a real dedication... might be wrong though). You just cannot explain how you want to print "things that do not suck" without explaining what you like.

And then there is the very strange decision to preface every story with a line from the story (just above the author/story bio). Usually an important line. Sometimes a line that ruins part of the story - because knowing that this line is coming, you see some things differently -- sometimes it might lead you in the wrong direction but these are short stories -- in most cases as soon as you start reading, you know what is coming because of that line. I stopped reading these lines after the first few stories and then checked them after I read the story itself -- some of them just had no work there.

But let's concentrate on the stories for a while - 20 stories overall - 1 graphic and 19 traditional ones. None of them really stands out - they rate between average and plain weird (with a few being almost unreadable). And even if a few did have a potential, it was lost quite fast - a good idea and a good first few paragraphs do not make a good story when the plot get lost midway and the end is simply predictable. And despite the claim that the anthology aims at showing the elves in a new light, that never happens -- none of the stories even tries to get out of the stereotypes - both for elves portrayals and for the type of stories - a lot of the stories are trying to sound as something they are not - noir stories, fairy tale stories, you name it. They try and fail - almost as if the authors tried to fit into a framework that just does not fit their work. The only story that really worked for me was "Of Roots and Rings" (the graphic story) - the medium and the fact that the story needed to be concise allowed the author not to screw up and finish the story badly. Not that even that one is a masterpiece or really original. But compared to the rest of the stories - it does stand out. And the sad thing is that some of these stories could have been saved if someone had worked with the author (or if the author had edited the story...)

And then there is the cover. Technically the cover kinda matches the topic. But it is so cliched... and the barely dressed elf-lady is unneeded -- there is a difference between love and sex... and the cover fits the second one better.

Is that the worse anthology I had read? No, not really. Even when the stories were failing at the end, some of them did have something in them. But it is not exactly a good one either and not something I would recommend. I would pick the next book from the publisher though (depends on the topic of course but if they stay in the fantasy/borderline genres, I will give them one more chance).

Hmm, this was a mistake, I think - that'll teach me to request books I'm not sure about. You get used to covers that mislead, and I hoped this one (which I don't like) might, but there was indeed way too much sex for me. That said, some of the stories are quite good - I thought "Tidings of Comfort and Joy" was original and interesting, and the graphic story was quite attractive and thoughtful, but too many of the others rely on a mock-heroic series of names, or on intentionally shocking quantities of blood and violence, for effect. Some are disconcertingly short. Duncan Eagleson's take on Chandler looked promising but failed to live up to my hopes. Disappointing.½

On the whole, Elf Love was a rather disappointing collection. I understand Pink Narcissus Press is relatively new, and I was quite willing to give them a break on that account, but I came away from this anthology with only one story I would recommend highly, and wouldn't you know, it's the only one without an actual Elf in it. A few more are solid, if not full-fledged standouts. The rest, unfortunately, are stunningly average stories, where some believe they're far too clever for words, and others simply and abruptly end, as if the author had a great idea that s/he was unable to fully execute, so s/he gave up and walked away.

I certainly appreciated the fact that the anthology attempts to provide a breadth of interpretation of "elf love," and a range of genres and stories, but overall, I felt as if there was no rhyme or reason to the ordering of the collection, and thus no sense of movement or thematic flow. In fact, many of the problems I had with the anthology appear to be editorial in origin. Since this is an ARC, I was not terribly concerned about typographical mistakes, but given how late in the publishing game ARCs go out, the fact that many of the stories clearly needed a heavier editorial hand to help tweak and clean up clunky writing as well as nudge the authors towards revising many an abrupt ending was beyond disappointing.

I'm going to take a cue from another LT reviewer and go through the stories one by one. I appreciated the dedication to Tolkien and Gygax, which showed me that the editorial team knows their audience, and the introductory material certainly set me up for an enjoyable reading experience.

However.

Not an Elf Yet - Ed Cooke
"Not an Elf Yet" was an interesting choice to start with, and entertaining enough. The throwaway nod to Tolkien was amusing, and I enjoyed the support group twist. I did feel, however, that the plotline ended rather abruptly, the reveal not seeming to have any clues dropped earlier in the (incredibly short) story, making it feel very much like a deus ex machina move. I actually expected to hear a "Ba-dum, tish!" at the end.

Tidings of Comfort and Joy - Josie Brown
This was, far and away, my very favourite story in the collection. It was a wonderful take on the theme, and managed to portray a range of emotion in a very compact form. I thought the framing tale added depth that wouldn't have been there if the story had simply gone straight to the experiences of Jesse, and while the story-within-a-story verged on telling instead of showing at times, it still worked. When I hit the end of this tale and with it, the full force of what had happened and the consequential fallout, I actually had to put the anthology down and take a break, because there was no reading anything afterwards without a breather in which to recover my equilibrium. A beautiful, sad story, I'm disappointed that none of the other works rose to its level.

Reclaiming the King - Duncan Eagleson
It was a good thing I took a break, too, because reading "Reclaiming the King" directly after "Tidings of Comfort and Joy" would have been a huge mistake. This was one of the stories that felt like it thought it was too clever by half, and another that obviously had a "Ba-dum, tish!" waiting at the end. I found much of the story chaotic and muddled, leaving me in a position where I had to reread small bits in order to puzzle out what I was supposed to be getting from them. There were a number of little things that niggled at me in the reading. For instance, I did not understand the obsession with the Pontiac LeMans and wondered why, after the initial explanation, it wasn't dialed back to "the car." And I found myself oddly offended at the way references to Tolkien were mixed in so they seemed less like referencing and more like trying to pass off Tolkien's work as the author's own. (And here I'm referring to his use of "Melkor," "Teleri," "Marroc," "Noldor," "Tirion," "Alqualondë," "Ainur," "Tol Eressea," and possibly some others I'm forgetting.) Given that the elves and their cultures as presented in the story bore no resemblance to those of Middle-earth, and the fact that the story itself was just a setup for a joke, it felt very much like a sullying. Additionally, so much of the plot hung on the reader not cluing in to the joke until late in the game that if you figured it out early and quickly (which I did), it simply ended up falling flat.

Color of the Sky - Juniper Talbot
This story was the first of a few that I was unable to puzzle out. It was an interesting premise, and I enjoyed the format and mixed perspectives, and I was hooked by the idea of a murder without a body, but by the end of the tale I was no more illuminated as to what was going on than at the beginning, and I found that when nothing new came clear on a quick reread and reconsideration, I moved on. I'm as interested in surreal, strange, twisty tales as the next person, but if I don't even have a glimmering of what's going on at the end, then something's gone wrong with the text.

The Phone Booth - Athena Giles
An enjoyable tale, with an interesting setting and set-up, this one got my hopes up before dashing them on the ground with an abrupt and disappointing ending that went nowhere. Additionally, the "romantic" subplot felt tacked on and unbelievable. I would have liked to at least see this one develop into a creepy tale of stalking, if nothing else. As it was, it was an explication of a moment in time that was weird, but ultimately inconsequential.

Goodnight, My Lady - Duncan Eagleson
I disliked Eagleson's "Reclaiming the King" so much that I was not at all set up to like "Goodnight, My Lady." However, it turned out to be marginally better than "Reclaiming." Sadly, all it was was a standard 1930s noir detective pot-boiler with an elfin twist. Vaguely entertaining, but fairly forgettable.

(S)elf Love - Rose Mambert
It's all right there in the title. An exceedingly short story built around the obvious gag. Good for a quick laugh, but there's not a lot there to sink one's teeth into.

A Long Friday - David Vernaglia
I liked the way the background was sketched out in this particular tale, in that the details were not set out up front, but rather skillfully revealed over the course of the story. "A Long Friday" felt very much like a companion piece to "Goodnight, My Lady," in that it, too, was a violent portrayal of crime and law enforcement. I didn't feel like the "love" component quite fit in the plotline, since I think it required a little more foregrounding than it received, and the ending was both abrupt and brutal, which I suppose is reasonable, given what happened, but as a reader, I felt a bit like the story came to a bone-shuddering, truncated end.

One of the Huldu - Otilia Tena
Much like "Color of the Sky," "One of the Huldu" was difficult to read. The fairy-tale tenor was there, and I loved that, but I got little out of the story itself, as I felt beaten down enough by the anthology at this point that I just didn't have it in me to puzzle out what was going on. This one was far too unclear, and would've benefited from more space and clearer explanations as to what was going on.

Whelp - Michelle Markey Butler
"Whelp" had a lot of promise, and I actually really enjoyed the conceit behind it. I loved the Shakespearean reference to Peaseblossom, I loved Madison (and the reason for her name and her boyfriend's name), and I thought the complication at the end involving the main character's sister was fascinating. I would have loved to see it play out a little more, but on reflection, after "Tidings of Comfort and Joy," "Whelp" is a very solid story, and one of the better ones in the anthology.

Of Roots and Rings - Sarah Eaton and Duncan Eagleson
I actually really like the fact that Elf Love mixed mediums by including a comic/graphic short story. It was a nice change, and proved that even if I wasn't fond of Eagleson as a writer, I liked his illustrations much more (although I did have to laugh at the fact that the title lettering is rather reminiscent of that found on The Lord of the Rings-related properties). Eaton's story was compact and satisfying in a way that many of the other tales were not. I liked the fact that the ending was both bittersweet (for the elf) and hopeful (for the main character). Another solid story, and a credit to the larger collection.

Xenium - Michael Takeda
I quite enjoyed most of "Xenium," as it had a very Arabian Nights feel to it. I was impressed with the slow movement from xenophobia to understanding by the various characters, but due to an obvious omission in correct grammatical usage, I also sussed out the end of the tale and what the whole conceit was hanging on far, far earlier than I think the writer was prepared for. Unfortunately, the reveal therefore fell flat for me, as the depth of the rest of the story was swept aside in service to it. This was another story that I felt really aspired to a wonderful height, and then fell a bit short.

The Turn of the Spoon, or Love and Bootblack - Bill Racicot
This story was a fun take on both The Shoemaker's Elves and the Keebler Elves with an interesting twist. I certainly appreciate that this collection included LGBT works without larger comment, and I enjoyed the handful of stories that included these elements (this being one of them). A nice, concise story that mixed a rather light tone with a macabre twist.

The Saga of Anund the Berserk - Rev DiCerto
I certainly appreciate the Scandinavian slant present in this story, but the fact is that all the wrong words were footnoted, or rather, not enough words of Scandinavian origin were footnoted. As it stood, I found my eyes simply moving across the page while I was barely taking in what was going on and not moved to find a dictionary or other reference work to look up the things I simply wasn't getting. I hit the end, found myself unmoved and adrift, and moved on.

And Their Mothers - David Vernaglia
"And Their Mothers" is a bit of a poor followup to "A Long Friday." It was obvious that the writer was attempting to show elves as rather cruel and unfeeling to one another, but it tipped over into sexism and misogyny far too fast. While Porpra is obviously the only sympathetic character in sight, Rosa and Gris' mother (Ama) are awful caricatures of females. I cringed at the sexism slung around by Rosa when talking of Ama, and was deeply disappointed by the portrayal of Ama herself. Vernaglia went far too far, implying that where elves as a whole are cruel, elf women are even worse, and that simply didn't sit right with me. There's also a weird point of view shift away from the narrator to Rosa for the duration of a paragraph that the editors really should've caught.

The Mischief Makers - Joe Mogel
"The Mischief Makers" starts out with a promising satire of the Twilight phenomena, which I appreciated, but quickly becomes a far too heavy-handed comedy. It is rife with pratfalls, slapstick and insult humour, and that's just not my thing. I was also horribly creeped out by the romance subplot, from its non-consensual beginnings to the underage pregnancy at the end.

To Kill the Oak King - Rose Mambert
Oh, I was entranced by "To Kill the Oak King" right off the bat. I enjoyed the intrigue, the setting, the characters... It was a really very promising story, working with all the right tropes and cliches. But the end of this one was like hitting a brick wall. I think I know what the author was going for, but I was too busy picking brickwork out of my teeth to feel like it hit the mark. The parallels between the elf's experiences and what happens to the human characters were a little too tenuous to properly line up.

David and Gerty - Jon Bishop
I can say, without hyperbole, that this was an awful story. I cannot imagine why anyone would think to include something like this that not only plays on ridiculous negative stereotypes about gamers and fantasy/sci-fi fans, but is directly insulting the very audience this collection is set up for. And for that matter, not only was it a terrible choice, the topic is beyond played-out. That ship has sailed. Painting speculative fiction fans of any stripe as socially awkward, corpulent, unemployed losers is no longer fresh or edgy; it's just sad.

Unseen - James Thibeault
"Unseen" was an impressively dark and bittersweet short that worked quite well and was very solid. Some of the dialogue was a little stilted, and overall I would have liked to see more space for this story to be developed in, as the sparseness of characterization created distance between myself as a reader and any larger emotional impact.

Feather Fall - Joanna Fay
"Feather Fall," as the last piece in Elf Love, was a good choice to end on, as it returned to the more traditional application of the theme under exploration. I was taken in by the world Fay sketches out, and the conflicts within it, but this tale definitely needed far, far more space for development. It is a really interesting sip where a larger draught is needed. As a result, the love story itself is so condensed it becomes unbelievable.

As I said up top, Elf Love is an average anthology with glimmers of greatness that never quite materialize. The overall quality is not high enough for me to recommend it as a purchase, but I do hope that the folks at Pink Narcissus Press gain some experience from it, and are able to polish those glimmers and turn them into stronger, higher quality works in the future.½

Anthology of 20 short stories with the theme of elf love, published by new small press Pink Narcissus Press. This is an ARC I received through the LibraryThing Early reviewers programme.

While the cover art suggests fantasy-subgenre romance stories, the contents are a good deal more wide-ranging. There's a good sampling of traditional themes about elves, some in modern settings and some not, and the endings cover the full span from happy through bittersweet hope to tragic. The genre styles vary considerably as well. And to go with the prose stories, there's one in graphic form.

Unfortunately the quality varied considerably as well, and for me a few of the stories were a waste of dead trees; but the best were well worth my time. There were several authors whose stories felt a bit unpolished but made me inclined to find more of their work once they've got a few more kilowords under their belts. Of particular note was Duncan Eagleson, who provided my two favourite prose stories in the anthology, together with the art for the graphic story (and the cover art, which I liked less than the graphic story).

There's some violence, and some sexually explicit and some erotic content (the two are not identical) covering a range of sexual orientations, mostly not gratuitous.

In spite of the uneven quality, this is a worthwhile anthology -- this is a good selection covering a range of story types, and I could have quite happily read the whole thing in one sitting without feeling that the stories were too repetitive. While my copy was an ARC, I personally wouldn't have been disappointed had I paid the full cover price of US$15 for the trade paperback. Whether other readers feel the same will really depend on how many of the stories work for them, and regrettably I have to say that the anthology is sufficiently uneven and unpolished that I can't wholeheartedly recommend it at that price.

I'll try to write up some detailed notes on individual stories later, but in general I'd agree with TPauSilver's comments on LibraryThing.

I got this collection of short stories from Early Reviewers. I'm all for giving new authors a chance but when the introduction goes on about collecting the best and stories that "don't suck" while admitting that the three editors have very different ideas about what's good maybe they should realise that readers will also have different ideas. So I expect that the ones I liked will be different to the ones another reader might enjoy so, for me, they range from the completely incoherent to bad to fair to a couple of good ones. Oh well - at least I've got a couple of new authors to look out for.½

I have to admit to something before we start, I applied for this book for a laugh. When I got it, I faceplamed. It looks a lot, from the cover and from the title and from the blurb, like this is one of those thinly disguised pornographic anthologies that normally call themselves "best love stories" or such.

It isn't porn.

I was pretty relieved when I realised this, then again when I realised it had some good stories in and I was going to enjoy it! I have to say that the second half of the book was not as good as the first half but stil, overall, it had some interesting stories and I enjoyed it.

One of the things I have to admit about this book is the way it incorperates gay and lesbian fiction like it's not a big deal. I love that. I hate that gay and lesbian fiction gets it's own little box, like it needs to be kept away from the straight fiction lest it corrupts it. Right, let's go through each story, that seems most sensible, since I did get this book free to review it.

Not an elf yet
This is funny and pretty inteligent, a girl writing about her boyfriend who's decided he'd an elf.

Tidings of comfort and joy
This was one of my favourite stories in the book and set a lot of my early impression of it as possitive. A guy finds work in an all-year christmas shop and tries to work out why his co-worker is so into dressing and asking like an elf. It's touching and interesting and well written, I enjoyed it very much.

Reclaiming the King
Another good story, which I enjoyed. The cast of characters are interesting and believable and the entire premis amused me a lot. Funny and interesting.

Color of the sky
And we hit the first bump in the road. I think it was about online gaming but...ok, I didn't get it. I hated the language and the way it was made deliberatley difficult to read. I'm not an intellectual lightweight but if you go out of your way to confuse and disorientation me you piss me of. What's the point of telling a story if nobody can even work out the plot? Not my thing at all.

The phone booth
Then we come back with another good one. This story sets up the kind of cliche, teen supernatural romance plot then foils it by having the teen in question act like a teenager. Very well thought out and funny.

Goodnight, my lady
A kind of noir detective novel only shorter and with elves. This was, along with Tidings of comfort and joy, the high side of the collection for me. I did enjoy this short story a lot. It reads well, the story is revealed just enough to keep you interested, the protagonist is just what one would expect, it was great.

{s}elf love
Didn't like this one. Elf learns to masturbate. Fairy dust is involved. I get the joke but I don't think it's funny and, yeah, the story just didn't work for me overall.

A long friday
I'm more on the fence about this one. I can see where it's coming from but it's not for me. An elf is beaten up by corrupt cops for a crime he didn't commit.

One of the Huldu
A more traditional fairy-tale style elf story, but...it's not incredibly well written, the point of it gets lost sometimes and I was left kind of wondering what the point even was. Not a bad story, just not good either.

Whelp
And we have a good one again. Not as good as my top two, just for the cliche factor, but I loved the characters. Our protagonist is a wolf/elf hybrid trying to find someone to mate with him but the only one like him is his sister (though one wonders why we can't go one way or the other, it's obviously possible for elves and werewolves to mate because, hello). I mostly remember the mermaid and the impotent vampire, who were hillarious and adorable. The plot was a little patchy but the characters were lovely.

Of roots and rings
A comic, and the middle of the book. Well drawn and I did like the story, there are a lot of good things going for this comic. I enoyed it very much.

Xenium
This story should have been cut in half. The prose is horrible sometimes, and I can see why it's included, the last line makes the piece and made me actually see why what, until that point, had been typical "Oh, the sexy whores like their fate" stuff, but it could have been at least cut in half and still kept that thing I liked at the end without pissing me off so much to get me there. But clever.

The turn of the spoon
Strange, and kind of funny but not. It takes the idea of shoemakers elves and kind of overlays some kind of odd justice system and adds a plot about revenge which I found odd, though I can see the thing in applying the worst of human emotions to things that are essentialy meant to be the best of human emotions only.

The saga of Anund the Beserk
I could not make head or tale of this. It's written in the style of a old Norse legend and involves some Vikings who wander around a while then find the land of the elves, kill and rape them, then go home and it's all good. I just, it was incredibly hard to read and I didn't get what the point of it was.

And their mothers
A kind of strange follow up to the story about the elf getting beaten up by the police. I didn't really know why it got included so much later in the book or...just why in general really The point about elves not loving was made in the first story, we didn't need this continuation.

The mischief makers
Read kind of like a emo kid's wet elf-dream. There is a elf who plays tricks, like in old elf stories, only they're tiny and live in a tree and have beurocrasy for some reason. And he needs to trick this girl who is like totaly a prep and into twilight and this girl who is so goff of whatever helps him and then the fall in wuv and trick people together. Yeah, I didn't think highly of it.

To kill the oak king
Ok, this...I admit I liked. We have the set-up of a Kingdom where elves are opressed and a nobel is saved by an elf (both male) who he then nurses back to health and they have sex and it reads kind of like a cliche fanfiction plot appart from the ending which I won't spoil and I'm kind of a sucker for these kinds of stories so, yeah, I have to admit that I enjoyed reading this one.

David and Gerty
The joke is that all online gamers are fat, socialy-inept fanboys who should never leave their computers. Hahahahahaha, that's never been done before.

Unseen
The last two play to cliche a lot. Ok, the back half of the book does and I didn't mind it what it was a cliche I liked but poor little elf girl gets trampled by horse and lover is upset doesn't do much for me.

Feather fall
Last one is a bad case of really bad love at first sight. They're from rival clans and his side killed her brother and her ide killed his son but they see each other and inexplicably fall in love and defy their tribes and their love that is like an entire 5 minutes old so totaly destined to last will definetley eventualy unite these two lands. Definitley.

So, yeah, that's the book. It's not a bad collection, if definitley has some high notes. It does have some low ones too, and the strong first half was very much let down by the weaker back half which is why I've given it a three. I think there are good stories and it's worth looking for, and I'll be keeping an eye open for other anthologies from this press, but the good is weighed down by the bad and the mediocre.

I'm pretty sure this book review is going to end up NSF work, mothers, grandmothers, little sisters, the innocent, the easily offended, people who think fairies are a nice version of Tinkerbell, and people who think fairies are everything Terry Prachett says of them in one of my favorite Discworld quotes:

Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder.
Elves are marvellous. They cause marvels.
Elves are fantastic. They create fantasies.
Elves are glamorous. They project glamour.
Elves are enchanting. They weave enchantment.
Elves are terrific. They beget terror.
The thing about words is that meanings can twist just like a snake, and if you want to find snakes look for them behind words that have changed their meaning.
No one ever said elves are nice.
Elves are bad.
--Lords and Ladies, Terry Prachett

This quote encompasses everything I believe about elves and fairies and all the Goodly Folk. Sometimes I half believe in them. I certainly would be more willing to believe in Fairy than aliens. No one can deny that I adore elves. The only plastic surgery I would remotely consider is having my ears pointed (don't worry, mom, I would never actually do that). I've been reading fairy tales, urban fantasy, and regular fantasy for longer than I can remember.

All of that said, I was mildly skeptical when I requested this book from LibraryThing's Early Reviewers. The cover is lurid and sensationalistic, but since I seek out urban fantasy, it seemed like something I should try. Really, when good elf stories are hard to come by, one must look where one can.

Well. Shall we begin?

Given that this is an advance reader edition of the book, I can hope that the misspelling of J.R.R. Tolkien's last name in the dedication and the typo in the sentence thanking the copy editor will be fixed by the time the official print run is completed. There were several other typographical errors and misspellings that I noticed, but by far, those were the most grievous offenses.

...but on to the stories. The introduction states that they hope to "defy the boundaries of genre" and publish fantasy that "doesn't suck." This sets the bar high: a lot of fantasy does, in fact, suck, and the boundaries of the fantasy genre are so wide as to be nearly all-encompassing. I was curious as to how they intended to accomplish these goals when I dove into the first story.

The first two were nothing special- both themes I've seen done over and over again in fantasy and horror. The third... without giving anything away, the third is a giant set-up for a one-liner at the end. A very well-known one-liner. I groaned, and not in amusement. More at the waste of my time.

But I continued on, working my way through more short stories. There seemed to be a running theme in the author blurbs about how they threw together their story so quickly- and this is something they state with pride. Revision would really have been their friend. Believe me.

For all the desire to defy boundaries, they never even approached sight of them, so deep in the heart of stereotypical elf fiction they remained. There was a great deal of gender ambiguity to- I think- prove a point about stereotypes, but even the attempts couldn't disguise the gender or what the writer was trying for. A lot of non-heterotypical relationships, to prove how open-minded and better elves are. (Except when it comes to half breed elves- then their prejudice comes out full force.) A lot of vulgar language that, in most cases, seemed forced and unnecessary. If it jolts me (a reader used to such language) out of the story, I'm going to think the author was shoving it in there like a teenager hell-bent on scandalizing the staid adults around him.

And don't forget to toss in a story about how people who game online can't interact with others in real life!

But sometimes you can find a gem hidden in the offal- and this would be To Kill The Oak King by Rose Mambert. Courtly intrigue, rebellion, and betrayal make for a good story, and hers was well paced and written.

However... I find it ironic that the one good point in the whole book was written by the same person who wrote the title(ish) story. Wherein we discover that fairy dust is actually elf ejaculate.

!!!!!!

The pre-story blurbs on her stories made it clear to me that the underlying goal of this anthology was to shock- because she states in To Kill the Oak King that the story almost didn't make it into the anthology and she was forced to revise twice. But she also was pleased to have banged out the first draft of (S)Elf Love in half an hour. The best story they had was nearly rejected, in favor of glittery elf ejaculate. There is not enough sarcasm in the world to cover that sentence.

I was surprised at how many of the writers approached the topic of elf love as though it had never been done before- odd, when you consider that many more stories have been written about elves and love than otherwise. And, other than To Kill the Oak King, none of the stories were worth the time it took me to read them.

I received this book for free through the LibraryThing Early Reviewers program.½

I found this book disappointing. I agree with previous reviewers who found the premise intriguing but the execution lacking. Some of the writers show promise, but none of them managed to rise above the mediocre. More stringent editing might have eliminated some of the glaring grammatical errors that marred the text.

I was a little uncertain about requesting this book from Early Reviewers. I enjoy a good fantasy story, and themed anthologies can be fun, but the title and the rather lurid cover did make me wonder whether the contents were likely to consist of schmoopy supernatural romance, or possibly softcore elf-fetish porn, neither of which holds much appeal for me. I felt greatly reassured, though, when I read the introduction, in which one of the editors writes, "A talented author sees a theme like that and says, 'That will be terrible unless...'" Which seems to me to be exactly the right attitude to take towards this kind of topic; that "unless" holds the possibility for generating all kinds of creative and worthwhile ideas. And the authors represented here do mostly seem to have taken that kind of approach and gone looking for non-traditional angles on the subjects of elves and love. There's lots of modern-day settings here, lots of alternative sexuality, lots of little idea-based stories...

However, most of the contributors seem to be first-time or relatively inexperienced writers, and I'm afraid it does show. Generally, the stories aren't bad, and a several of them are quite pleasant reads, but almost none of them feels truly, completely satisfying. There are stories with interesting ideas that aren't fleshed out fully, and, conversely, ones with ideas too slight to sustain a whole story without some extra spark that just isn't there. There are decent premises executed in adequate but unengaging prose, and one piece that has lovely prose but is so obscurely written that it's impossible to tell what it's actually about. There are stories that are trying a little too hard to be dark and gritty, or attempting to do social commentary with too heavy a hand, or both at once. One of the best-written stories seems to exist mainly to lead up to a surprise ending that contains no surprise whatsoever. Another is a noir-ish detective pastiche that's rather delightful, until the realization sets in that it really just inelegantly and rather pointlessly grafts elves onto a hardboiled detective tale that would have been better off without them. (And according to the author's note, in which he confesses to essentially lifting the plot from someone else's novel, probably was.) And so on.

Bottom line: It's better than it looks, but not nearly as good as it could be.

This title appears to be from a new publisher/press for which I say, Yeah! and Congratulations! Seventeen authors that are new to me! Always good to see fresh faces.

I have to admit that I rarely if ever buy anthologies. I get them from the library and read them simply to find promising new authors. Usually, I can find one or two stories that strike my fancy in an anthology but most simply don't suit my tastes, interest, or standards for a good read. This one is no different. And while I don't care for every story, I often enjoy the new ideas and concepts presented by the various writers.

As Granpa used to say, if we all had the same taste, everyone would be chasing after your Granma. So I like what I like but you may like different stories in this book. The only way to tell is read a copy yourself. Following are the authors from whom I would look for future works.

1. "Reclaiming the King" & 2. "Goodnight, My Lady" by Duncan Eagleson.
Eagleson's first story highlights the inherent problems with timeless elfland. Fae changelings must be placed in the human world til they age to maturity. What could go wrong with this plan?

His second is a take-off of the tough guy detective of the 1930s only our PI is one of the few who is aware of the Fae and willing to face them down. Think of any of the old b&w detective movies, add the complication of amoral Faerie, and enjoy the results.

"Xenium" by Michael Takeda.
Desert Fae and an Arctic visitor/ambassador who may decide their fate. Talk about your culture shock! A well-done and interesting creation. Could easily become a novel and I'd be interested in it.

"The Saga of Enund the Berserk" by Rev DiCerto
While I'm not a huge fan of viking lit, DiCerto may make me one. It's obvious he had researched his history well before penning this interesting tale. Excerpted from his novel, I did find some actions inexplicable or unsatisfactorily explained but chalk that up to this short story's origins. I'd bet the details I was looking for are contained in the novel...

"Feather Fall' by Johanna Fay
The only traditional elf "love story" in the book. A Romeo & Juliet story of warring fae clans. The cover art illustrates Fay's short story.

Mambert's "To Kill the Oak King" would have made my list except for the predictable ending. A good read up until the ending when she went for a cheap-shot O'Henry finale. The end. It just didn't cut it. But I'd look for more from her too.

I would suggest this book for "adults only" due to language, straight & gay sex/sexuality and violence. Some necessary and integral to a story's plot. Some not.

[Disclaimer. Book received as an Advance Reading Copy in exchange for book review]½