Peter Lefcourt writes funny books. The [b:The Dreyfus Affair A Love Story|452940|The Dreyfus Affair A Love Story|Peter Lefcourt|http://photo.goodreads.com/books/1223664250s/452940.jpg|441549] was an amusing history of a major league shortstop who "comes out" and discovers there's more to life than baseball.

[b:Abbreviating Ernie|807340|Abbreviating Ernie|Peter Lefcourt|http://www.goodreads.com/images/nocover-60x80.jpg|1186222] is the story of a successful urologist who is abruptly castrated while in the midst of a kinky sexual escapade with his wife in the kitchen of their home in Schenectady. The urologist also makes an appearance in The Woody, a hysterical novel that had me laughing out loud. Woodrow White is a senator from Vermont up for re-election. He discovers he has a problem — E.D., erectile dysfunction — while having an affair with Evelyn Brandywynne, a lobbyist for N.A.H.P.I. (National Association of Health Prophylaxis Industries). He seeks out Dr. Haas, assuming an alias: James Monroe.

Lefcourt freely applied presidential names to his characters. John Quincy Adams is president of the Vermont Maple Syrup Growers Association, a Mafia front, that offers $500,000 to Woody's campaign if he will nominate a prominent prosecutor for an appellate court judgeship. What Woody doesn't know, or doesn't want to know, is that this prosecutor is breathing hard down Adams' neck. Turns out that J. Q. is the biggest mobster in Vermont who enjoys roto-tilling his backyard with folks who fail to pay their vigorish on time. His subordinates are named appropriately: Abigail Adams is his secretary, Thomas Paine his hired gun, Ethan Allen drives his limo.

That's not the worst of Woody’s problems. His second wife wants a divorce so she can run off with a female Finnish ice-skater. Through a misunderstanding, the couple's illegal alien butler (who speaks only Italian) misinterprets a threatening fax from Woody to his wife. IN retaliation, the butler dognaps their dachshund and threatens to send miscellaneous body parts if his immigration status is not remedied.

Woody's first wife is suing for just about everything, his son gets arrested for a boatload of marihuana, and his daughter has assumed the name Ruth and is living with the village blacksmith in an Amish community. Not to mention the Ethics Committee is investigating a $400,000 gift to his campaign ostensibly from Toga, an African republic thankful for Woody's vote on the African Affairs Committee, but hidden behind a fake PAC trying to get funding for Gilles de la Tourette Syndrome. Even worse, Woody backed into Trent Lott's car and Trent is demanding ever-increasing damages for the minor scrape.

Woody's chief of staff, Ishmael, is trying to make it with Maud while going undercover with a group of gay congressional aides. They provide the best source of information on the Hill when not discussing what great clothes people are wearing. Ishmael is the only closet heterosexual I’ve run across.

Given current affairs (sorry) in the Clinton White House and the Edwards household, this novel was particularly prescient. The author, in a note on Amazon.com said he had intended to model his character on Bob Packwood, with the moral being that we judge our politicians not by their morality, but their sexuality. Which is why, when Ishmael realizes the story of Woody's visits to the urologist for his testosterone problem are about to become public, he makes up a story that Woody has prostate cancer, a condition often caused by too much testosterone. He knows that Americans will tolerate too much screwing around, but certainly not a low testosterone.

Anyway, you get the idea. The denouement is hysterical, especially the final debate between Woody and his sanctimonious challenger that takes place in the midst of a Vermont cow pasture, where the moderator was to mark up the number of cow chips (euphemism for mudslinging) verbally slung by each candidate.

The only problem with this book is that it’s been described as a satire. Nonsense. Not with the likes of Lorena, Buttafuocco, Clinton, and O.J. out there. ( )