Of course by rights this work must be dedicated to: Melanie Marttila without whose efforts the book you now hold in your hand would be called The Sequel Formerly Known As Prince or some such.

However, it have come to this humble editor, as it must go to all humble editors (the three of us get together for drinks sometimes down at Binky's Oyster Bar) that there is room in a really spiffy Dedication for more than one round of thanks and acknowledgement. Therefore, in this late hour of soft purple twilight and not enough gin, I would like to append the following tribute to a woman who is perhaps this work's chief Muse and guiding light, whether she likes it or not.

Also, Binky promised the Humble Editors' Club a round of free drinks if this Dedication caused the lady in question to send him an autographed photo.

Ahem:

Hail to thee, O Lucy Lawless,
Xena actress great and flawless!
Beacon by whom we all steer
In this book. Wish you were here.
Thou who art a constant charmer,
Thou who wearest way cool armor,
thou who provest, day by day,
Women have a lot to say
Whether sword or child in hand,
Spread our message through the land!
Say to every mother's son:
"We are strong, but we're still fun.
"Do not fear us, do not hate us,
"Never, never underrate us.
"We are Women, aye, you betcha.
"Want to rile us? We won't letcha.
"Whether what we choose to don
"From Frederick's comes or Pentagon
What we wear don't signify
"Diddlysquat, for by and by
"You will learn (as most men do)
"We're your equals. Whoop-de-doo
So once more, thee do we hail,
Lucy Lawless, and the Grail
Of full-fledged equality
Which we hope we'll live to see
Thou who art, in syndication,
Hope of all the female nation,
Thou whom sponsors court and coddle,
Thou, our daughter's chief role modle,
Thou who play'st no girlie games
But kickest butt and takest names,
Please accept this book, with thanks
From thy sisters in the ranks.

"Bad doggerel. No biscut!"
-Dr. Samuel Johnson (attrib.)