What would you do if you were a few months from collecting early retirement--a pension for which you'd sucked up and sycophanted almost twenty years--when your obscenely overweight and extremely crass boss told you that if you didn't raise the company's market share by the end of the year, you'd be out on your ass without a dime? If you're Sky Thorne, Senior V.P. of Tailburger--a fringe fast food chain whose specialties are batter dipped, deep-fried meat patties and 96-oz. beef-flavored shakes--you'll get to work on as many harebrained, desperate schemes as you can think of. And if that means launching a marketing campaign that asks the public, "Why just abuse your body when you can torture it?" then damn it, that's what you'll do! Because Sky Thorne is ready to fight dirty and do anything necessary to earn the pension he sees as the reset button on life, liberty, and the pursuit of unadulterated deep-fried happiness. Red Meat Cures Cancer is a hilarious and poignant romp through a world of excess, and marks the arrival of a great new satirical voice in American literature.