Wow. A gripping and sad memoir of a woman who has lost her entire life to identity theft, and still can't quite connect to others.

Not only did it cast a pall over her childhood, adolescence and early adulthood, but Axton then spent her twenties and early thirties getting advanced degrees that focused on identity theft. It has shaped every aspect of her life. ( )

powerful story of lies and manipulation

This is as well-written as any novel. I would recommend it to anyone: you don't have to be a victim of identity theft or financial exploitation to appreciate it, but if you grew up in a disturbed family dynamic it may be triggering.

Part of the reason it would appeal widely, and simultaneously part of the reason that it might be triggering, is that the financial shenanigans are occurring in the context of mental illness and just plain meanness, psychological manipulation, denial, lies, and emotional abuse along with estrangement (cutoffs, in family-therapy speak) and infidelity. It's a morass of dysfunction even without the money factor.

You find yourself rooting for Axton as she studies her way out of there, all the way to a Ph.D. and national recognition in her field. It's like a major plot thread in a novel: Will she make it? Yes! And part of what makes this such a powerful read is that she is so frank about the scars that she bears, about the tremendous cost at which she made it out, what it's still costing her.

All of this is only slowly revealed, however, as the outline of the book follows the author's growing traumatization, understanding/awareness, and power as she ages and matures. This actually makes it into kind of a page-turner: You really want to know what happens next! One night I stayed up two hours late reading a particularly intense section, another day I lost an hour of work on it. I did think I had it figured out about halfway through, much in the same way that one does while reading a murder mystery, but reviewers who complain about this miss the point: People who exploit others in this manner are (otherwise they couldn't do it) masters at deceit, taking advantage of the very traits that we prize in ourselves and others--honesty, faith, loyalty, love, and yes, sometimes blind trust in the very relatives, neighbors, friends or professionals who we count on to have our backs, not stab us in same. The victims don't have our perspective, our advantage of hindsight conferred by authors of memoirs or biographies.

It was disturbing, but I'm not sorry I read it, if only because I learned something new and 'met' someone in Dr. Betz-Hamilton that I can like and admire. If you're on the fence about reading it, I'd say go for it. ( )

For student

I wish I had not tuned into this author's library program until AFTER I had read the book because she told us all about it and revealed who stole her identity. Had I read it first I am sure I would have been way more shocked - but as I read this memoir I knew what was coming. When Axton was a child her parents had their identity stolen and it made them fearful of everyone - who was doing this to them, why were checks bouncing and utilities getting cut off. It led for a lonely childhood. When she finally flew the coop and left for college, Axton was excited to leave the fear behind her and start the next chapter of her life, but unfortunately when she goes to get her own apartment she discovers that her credit is in the bottom 2% - it's beyond horrible. It turns out it wasn't just her parents with stolen identities - her had been too. Credit cards taken out in her name when she was just a child, the whole gambit. Axton makes it her mission to get to the bottom of it but sometimes the answers are worse than the problems. Heartbreaking - what a messed up little family. ( )

Before instances of identity theft became unfortunately more frequent as the Internet became more of a staple in everyday life Axton Betz-Hamilton's parent's identities were stolen. Starting when she was eleven she watched her parents credit and their marriage deteriorate at a rapid pace. The banks, lenders and authorities didn't have rock solid methods established for dealing with identity theft so Axton's parents pleas for help seemed to fall on mostly deaf ears.

The identity theft seemed inescapable as it even followed them to different addresses after their personal information had also been changed. Confident that it was someone in their lives that knew them personally, Axton's parents isolated their family from the small town that they lived in - including family and friends. Growing up isolated, strangers, family and friends caused Axton to develop anxiety, panic attacks and an eating disorder at a very young age. Her mother became obsessed with perceptions of their family and accepted nothing less than perfection in public. As time continued without results of finding the culprit Axton not only grew up but also attended college. It was while she was attending college that Axton found out that it wasn't just her parents that became a target of the thief that had plagued her childhood.

I feel like true crime books are very hit or miss on the writing style and Axton definitely made it easy on us in her autobiography and/or memoir. Honestly this book could technically be considered both. Her book doesn't cover a lot of her story before the start of her teens but she has dealt with the aftermath of identity theft the majority of her life. Just the fact that she chose to essentially embrace what had happened to her and her family while turning it into something mostly positive for herself is inspiring. Not to mention after being a private person she chose to share her story with the masses in hopes of helping others. It has been a while since I've had similar connections with an author of anything I've read. Similarly to Axton I grew up in small town, on a farm and was a member of our local 4-H and my high school's FFA chapter as well.

If you are not already familiar with Axton's story do yourself a favor and DON'T Google her if you don't want to potentially spoil the book. I was nearly at the end and I wanted to look up something she'd referred to, I wish I hadn't - it spoiled the buildup of Axton finally finding out who had targeted her family nearly her whole life. Even though I ruined the discovery of who did it for myself the ending still blew me away. I literally cannot even imagine what that must have been like.

"Instead I was mad that our paranoia ran so deep it seemed to create canyons of silence between us and the people we should have been closest to."

I would highly recommend reading this book if you enjoy true crime, nonfiction, autobiographies, memoirs and mysteries. I would like to thank NetGalley and Grand Central Publishing for the chance to read this inspiring true crime novel. I would also like to thank Axton for sharing her life story and struggles with those who read her book, articles etc. ( )