#6 in the Pennsylvania Dutch Mystery series. There's a cooking contest that's going on at the Penn Dutch. Contestants include a native American woman, an African American man from the south, the daughter of a retired general, Freni and the hostess of a cooking show. The contest is being put on by a frozen food company. Things take a twist when one of the judges gets food poisoning. It would seem that this might put the contests on hold but there's a clause that says that the contest will go on no matter what. And that clause is put to the test when the owner of the company also the contest owner too is killed in the barn. We learn the from the ill judge that each of the contestants had something against the dead man, from stealing their recipes, to demotions and other things. ( )

It's difficult for me to think of the last time a book annoyed me so much, and in so many different ways. But I'll start with the main issue, which for me is the main character, Magdalena Yoder, the detective and proprietor of a country inn in Pennsylvania Dutch country (well, maybe . . . ). I want to like the main character of a mysteries series, and a few quirks make that more likely, not less--from Sherlock Holmes to Nero Wolfe to Monk, quirky detectives are a stock in trade. But Magdalena isn't quirky--she's a bitch. She insults, fights with, chivvies, corrects, bosses around, and otherwise behaves unpleasantly to everyone she meets--family members, old 'friends,' guests at the inn, the local police chief, doctors, nurses, you name it. Often she sprinkles a patronizing 'dear' into her conversation, just as she's insulting the other person. Ugh.

Okay, some other issues: this book is supposed to take place in Pennsylvania Dutch country, but at one point she mentions that she needs a new doorbell and might drive into Pittsburgh one day to get it. Pittsburgh? Has the author looked at a map of Pennsylvania? Pennsylvania Dutch country is in the southeast; Pittsburgh is so far west it's almost in Ohio. Philadelphia is the nearest really large city, but I'm going to take a wild guess here and suggest that Lancaster probably has a Home Depot, Lowe's, or both, and either would have a nice stock of doorbells.

Basic fact checking: at one point Magdalena informs her cook, in reference to Philadelphia, 'There's only one, dear.' Well, no. In addition to the big one in Pennsylvania, there's one in Indiana, Tennessee, Mississippi, New York, and North Carolina.

Recipes: this book features a cooking contest and several recipes are provided. This actually is one of the things that drew me to the book. I'm unlikely to try them out, though--the very first recipe is a bread pudding that has no eggs in it. Basically it consists of bread, sugar, milk, and spices. I don't know, and I don't think I'll ever find out, what the consistency of this would be if one actually made it. I'm willing to concede that I might be wrong--just because the first dozen or so recipes for bread pudding I looked at all had eggs doesn't mean it has to have them. Anyone?

Further reading reveals two other recipes that have instructions to incorporate ingredients not listed in the list of ingredients. I don't know if this is sloppy writing or sloppy editing or both. The seafood crepes call for milk in the filling, but it's not on the list. I'm also a little mystified by the directions to include five large shrimp (doesn't say anything about chopping them up) as part of the mixture that one is then directed to put 2 tablespoons of into the crepe. Anyway, once the crepes are assembled they are to be put in the oven for 15 minutes--wouldn't the shrimp (already cooked) be overcooked after that? The other recipe with a missing ingredient is the tomato brunch cake, in which one is directed to cream the shortening and sugar--only there's no shortening in the list of ingredients.

Further adding to my annoyance is the conceit that the inn has hosted many of the rich and famous and Magdalena is supposedly chums with many of them, especially Barbara Streisand (Magdalena keeps answering her phone 'Babs?'). I think the reader is supposed to be amused by these references.

But here's one of my many problems: I don't believe this unfriendly, unwelcoming, nasty piece of work could possibly be a success in what is euphemistically called the hospitality industry. No suspension of disbelief happening here.

One more issue before I pause to read the rest of this dreck (only being a completist can account for my planning to do this): the first conversation in the book, mostly on the subject of the cooking contest, offers a complete non sequitur so that the author can introduce some backstory information. One minute we're talking about the cooking contest, the next Magdalena interjects something about her failed relationship. This I put down to sloppy writing.

Okay, I've finished it. The resolution of the mystery was, at best, weak, with a motive so pathetic as to make one almost sorry for the murderer.

Yes: I really, really, really disliked this book. (Just in case there was any doubt remaining.)

Interesting for its bits of Amish/Mennonite culture (and the vast differences between), but that was the long and short of its appeal. As a mystery, rudimentary. No painful usage of syntax, however, and the protagonist was honest to her setting. Comes with recipes- interesting. (Liked the Mexican tortilla cake!) C - plus

A humorous read, but somewhat plodding. ( )

Hosting a cooking contest at her PennDutch Inn, Magdalena Yoder fears that a murderer lurks among the competitors when the CEO of a gourmet food company is found dead in the barn ( )