London Tracy

I was not sure what to expect from this book when I began it. The author has provided the reader a very good blueprint to write a book. The best book to write is the one on a subject about which the author or would-be author knows most intimately, his/her life. This book is jam packed full of ideas about how to go about planning the book, starting the book, writing the book and selling the book. The author doesn’t stop with the finished book, but goes on to provide useful and interesting ways to get it out there for public consumption. Though the book is geared principally toward writing a life story, I found it chock full of great ideas any budding author could use. Because of this, I recommend anyone who is interested in writing, about his/her own life, about anyone else’s life or about anything should give this short book a read. I am sure any reader, regardless of his/her level of experience and/or expertise can benefit from the book. I found it interesting, though I am not nor do I aspire to become a writer of my own autobiography, of anyone else’s or of any book. I just enjoy reading good books, and this is one of them. I received this from Library Thing to read and review.… (más)

DISCLAIMER: I am a screenwriter myself. So while most of my notes will be based on industry standards, I want to also cover what the average reader might like and dislike.

At the very beginning, I wanted to know who Cheryl and Larry David were and what their relationship to one another was. This poor character development left me wondering if they were husband and wife, daughter and father, grandfather and granddaughter, or cousins. There is no clear character description. It might seem a trivial part of a screenplay, but it is very important because with a screenplay, you only have a short amount of time to snag your audience and make them like or dislike a character and make them connect to the characters. This is not the case with The Curse Interior. Even when Tracy does give descriptions of the characters, it’s too little information. And the information and details that are given aren’t really important to developing the character. Bambi, for instance, is written as “a delicious piece of candy”. I could only draw up the stereotypical image of a not so smart blonde woman with large breasts and an oversexed personality. In the end, it doesn’t matter how Tracy wants the character to read, it’s how the audience reads her. If we are supposed to see Bambi a certain way, the author has to write her that way.

There is an overabundance of dialogue that doesn’t move the plot anywhere. There is no conflict or character arc. The repetition is unnecessary; Cheryl says twice that she’s met the neighbors and they seem nice, Larry constantly talks about the paper, and the idea of the neighbors being lesbians emerges often throughout the first ten or so pages. No matter how many times the repetition occurs, it does nothing for the conflict of the scenes. Every scene has to have a conflict or at the very least develop the character arc. Another bit of advice on the characters; they should be original and developed early in the screenplay. Every character needs to have a purpose, even if small. Lana, Lollipop and Bambi really served no purpose. They had an appearance once and never again. Larry and Cheryl could have easily had the same discussion about lesbianism without those characters appearing. The use of Halle Barry, Robert Downey, Jr. and etc. was not a good move. It made me think that the author ran out of ideas for characters. The introduction of these real life characters detracted from the story by making it turn in a way that didn’t escalate any conflict or cause the plot to advance.

There were several grammar issues and formatting issues in this screenplay. “LARRY DAVID stands at the window, drinking coffee. He watches the new neighbors move in” could easily be condensed to “LARRY DAVID stands at the window, drinks his coffee and watches the neighbors move in”. I know Tracy was probably trying to uphold the three lines of description rule, but there are ways to say what you mean without compromising line space. Another passage is in need of revision as well: “Larry approaches. Just as he is about to pick up the paper, a Hispanic woman approaches and steps on it. She is LANA GOLD, a Barbie doll with dark hair” can be read better as, “Larry grabs the paper, but LANA GOLD (Hispanic, dark hair, Barbie doll features) steps on it. This saves two and a half lines. That makes lines to insert more character details. There are a few more places where the descriptions/actions can be shortened. Likewise, there are a few more areas where this teleplay can use revision and a thorough edit.… (más)