Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah

I am so honored for the opportunity to read this book. There are many conversations around queer, sex, trauma, relationships, travel, and finding yourself journeys. I cannot say this enough but every one of African black Caribbean etc descent NEED to read this book. I want to see this book in college courses and passed down through generations. I have nothing but love for this book that all I can say is my story: For me, sex was not shunned in regards to sex. I still was told hetero sex should be between a man and a woman. Sometimes I was told it should be after marriage other times it would be tested before you buy it. Later on, through watching TV and feeling tingles I somehow taught myself how to masturbate it is one of "my favorite activities" and I did not learn to properly do it until maybe 12/13. Over time through Tumblr and porn sites I found lesbian sex more interesting. Then as my hormones developed and high school I was no longer dry-humped or anything. Not much for kissing. I did not have sex of any kind like my peers for a while. After high school ended badly for me I found someone who liked hand jobs and letting me dry hump them. We did it like twice until that fell apart for cultural and religious reasons. Then on 20/21 had my first arranged relationship met for a week after 6 months of dating through my mom's advice we had sex and it was bad. I had my first toy at 19 and love my little bullet. During covid, I knew I would not get comfortable with penetration unless I practiced, and at 20 got a dildo to try. Then I learned how dual stimulation was important to me. Coming back to bad sex it didn't help that I did not have romantic feelings which killed the sexuality I thought I could have. Every time we had sex it just left me waiting for it to be done. I left that relationship. I was fine for a while and did not have an interest in anyone or anything because I had terrible experiences with dating or even getting someone to see me. I bought a new toy that I love because my sex drive was so bad I was wet all the time and could not focus I wanted to have sex only sex but could not find a safe person to do it with. I did not know how to attract women because I present femme and don't give off "the vibes". I had gotten to the point where I accepted I would not be able to form a deep bond and should just have sex if it presents itself and have kids on my own down the line. Then unexpectedly after almost a year of therapy and dating myself I was found. As a new person very different from who I used to be growing up I was diagnosed, as confident, calmer, and overall my true self. They saw my big brain and liked me. We have sex and are slowly but surely learning each other and what that all means. I am happy and don't want anything to end so for now I just keep loving myself as if there is nothing else that matters but myself. Cultivating my cultural, spiritual, emotional, sexual, physical, mental,queer, and logical senses to be happy however, I see fit. Thank you Nana!… (más)

Avant tout, c'est mon avis. N'allez pas me mettre sur le bûcher à cause de ce que j’ai écrit. C’est MON opinion. Je dis ça parce que je trouve les gens un peu trop sensibles ces derniers temps. Bisous!

L’histoire regroupe des témoignages de 32 femmes africaines ( afro descendantes etc) sur leur sexualité. Ces interviews ont été réalisées par l'autrice, Nana.

Je trouve le concept très original. C'était intéressant pour moi de lire des témoignages d’autres femmes sur comment elles abordent leurs sexualités. Des témoignages honnêtes et sans chichi. Chacune des femmes du livre ont pu donner leur définition et représentation de la sexualité. On y voit aussi les dommages que peut causer une sexualité refoulée mais aussi les problèmes sexuels que certaines femmes rencontrent chez elles une fois adultes qui ont leur source directement dans leur enfance. Une lecture très enrichissante je trouve.

En même temps, il y a des histoires que je trouve exagérées mezanmi . Eske se konsa vre moun yo ap viv deyo a?? Ce livre m’a montré à quel point je ne comprendrai jamais ce truc de polygamie que j’associerai plutôt à du libertinage au lieu d'être “liberating” comme elles disent. Parmi ces femmes, il y en a qui ont tout simplement un petit souci avec l’infidélité et la définition même de liberté. Parce qu’il y a des choses que j’ai lu dans ce livre, OH non. Le pire c’est que c’est presque le cas dans tous les livres . J’ai été choquée par ce que je lisais. La façon dont, pour la plupart de ces femmes, être en couple avec quelqu’un et voir ailleurs en même temps c’est normal. “C’est ma vie” “ Je me sens libre de mon corps” this and that bref.

A lire en ayant un esprit ouvert!

… (más)