Robert Collins (3) (1965–)

Article first published as Book Review: Expert Assistance by Robert Collins on Blogcritics.

Going from being broke and having no opportunity to redeem yourself to having two opposing gigs is something that can really throw you off stride. When one job entails protection of a seriously spoiled Diva, and the other entails helping a rebellion to succeed on a compromised planet, how do you choose the one most important. Or do you?

Jake Bonner is a down and out spaceship pilot. He is in hock and only has a ship because it was abandoned in space where he was able to connect to the ships computer, Odin. Without Odin, most of what Jake has accomplished would not have been possible. All the same, Jake is in trouble. He is unable to pay his debts so when Odin is able to secure him not just one job but two; he is ready to take charge.

Evvie Martini, a young pop star, is his initial workload. He is to chauffeur her and keep her safe during her tour. When her tour just happens to coincide with his second opportunity it seems like luck is smiling with him. Daniel and Clarissa Rosen need help overthrowing the dictatorial ruler of their planet. This is more to Jakes liking and abilities, but the money is necessary from his chauffeuring gig. In between concerts and tours, Jake is hard at work helping the Rosen’s along the way on their rebellion. Keeping the two jobs separate is really becoming an issue, and when Evvie finds out what he is up to there is no stopping her. She is now convinced that the publicity she would receive by being involved in helping in the rebellion will give her better standing with her fans, and when her parents and publicist agree, Jake is in for the time of his life.

Expert Assistance, by Robert Collins is a funny and perverse look at putting together a rebellion on a shoestring. Using his interesting team, which now consists of Odin, his computer, Evvie, and the Rosens he is in just a bit over his head. Can they come together in such a way as to help Antioch Two succeed from its leader, and free those living in oppression?

Collins has written a fun and somewhat absurd science fiction that tickles your senses. Evvie is the quintessential teen, full of drama and full of herself. She is amusing and like any other teenager works at breaking the rules. When she has an opportunity of a lifetime to become part of a rebellion she is in it up to her neck. She jumps in with both feet and her presence is part of what makes the whole situation possible. She is like many other teens you run across, and it was unexpected to find she was actually pretty sharp.

Jake Bonner is a self-starter, long on brains and abilities, but never quite up to snuff at staying ahead of the money game. His ship is really all he has and when he realizes the constraints his finances have landed him in, he is game to jump into the fray. He seems to have an innate sense of humor, and is able to roll with the punches. Oden, his shipboard computer rounds up his personality with witty and fun as well as challenging repartee. This dialogue keeps the humor and action going at a quick pace.

The Rosens are just a nice couple who want changes on their planet. They are looking to help free their people from oppression, and have many ideas but most of them are just quite absurd and they look to Jake for answers.

If you are looking for a fun read with interesting characters this book will be up your alley. It will also resonate with the science fiction buff, but be prepared for just a bit of slapstick humor. The pace is quick and the action is continual. A fun and interesting read.

This book was received as a free copy from the author. All opinions are my own based off my reading and understanding of the material.… (más)

Sit back and imagine, if you will, a story where Lazarus Long, Hannah Montanna, and the Marvin the Paranoid Android on prozac get together to liberate a planet. Got that image in your head? Sounds like fun doesn't it? Yep. Reading it was fun, too.

Jake, the main character is something of a cross between Han Solo and Lazarus Long. Like Han he's in financial trouble. Like Lazarus he seems to have seen and done everything at least once. And like both of them he exudes a sense of fond grouchiness at the naive-cute-and-fuzzy-puppy types that keep tripping through his life.

Like Lazarus, Jake has a sentient computer/spaceship with a brain the size of a planet. This one is not depressed, but does seem to have a dry sense of humor and irony sensors on overdrive. Odin, in addition to knowing basically everything that ever was recorded, also has teleporter technology, can build almost anything, and crack basically any code. As you can imagine, Odin is a very good friend to have. Odin was built as a military vessel. He became sentient and decided he did not want to be a warship. Jake found him floating abandoned in the middle of space, probably bought him some fuel, and the two have been together since.

And now, looking for some fast money, Jake has a new job. Two new jobs really. One is shuttling Evvie Martini (Hannah Montanna, down to her dyed hair) from gig to gig. The other is helping the people of Antioch Two throw off Sordius Maxi, the owner of their planet.

Of course, eventually Evvie finds out about the revolution, gets involved, and a cute little tale that can be described as "Yay Liberty!" ensues. The story is more or less the fictional equivalent of kettle corn. It's sweet, crunchy, yummy, but not exactly nutritious.

Here's why. In the past I've mentioned something called power balance. So, let's talk a little more about plot and power balance. For a plot to work, the good guys and the bad guys need a shot at winning. It can be a one in a million shot, that's good reading, too. But unless you want to study some sort of human emotion, (ie lit fic) the guys on one side can't so completely overpower the guys on the other to the point where the guys on the other have absolutely no shot at winning. Sure the struggle of David V. Goliath is good reading, but the struggle between Goliath and the quadriplegic toddler isn't. The toddler has no chance at all.

Maxi never had a shot. Odin isn't so much taking a gun to a knife fight as taking a tank and making sure that Omniscient God Almighty is driving it. Maxi was so far out gunned by that computer it wasn't funny. And to throw the power balance off even further, Maxi is a lot more like Fredo Corleone than Michael.

There's no tension to this plot, because there's no real danger. There's no chance the revolution won't work. There's no possibility of any of the main characters being in any danger. Because of that, none of the main characters experience any real change. And why would they? Nothing was really risked. Evvie is just a childish at the beginning of the revolution as she is in the end. The rebels are just as clueless; they never had to learn anything. Odin, well, he's already the pinnacle of intellectual evolution, so there was nowhere for him to go. Jake has no deeper understanding of anything because he knew it all to begin with.

If you'll forgive the comparison, this is not Moon is a Harsh Mistress. It's not even close.

When discussing revolution it's hard to avoid politics. This was a fairly innocuous screed against commercialism, without being insulting or annoying. I'm about as far off on my side of the political spectrum as it's possible to get, and I didn't find the political content too bothersome. I doubt anyone else who can still claim to be somewhere on the rational scale would either.

So, if you want a cute and safe read, an adventure where you know everyone comes home just peachy and the good guys are guaranteed to win, this one's for you.… (más)

A starship owned by Jake Bonner docks at a space station and finds that it will not be allowed to leave until Jake comes up with cash for a past-due debt. He reluctantly takes on a job of escorting a young pop star on her tour. He is also contacted by a couple from a colony planet, Antioch Two, that offers to pay him 5% of all planet mining profits, each year, for life, in exchange for his help in overthrowing the current owner of the colony, Sordius Maxis. While onboard the ship, pop star Evvie Martini finds out about the plan, and sees it as a great way to promote her career. Jake reluctantly agrees to let her help, and the revolution begins.

Expert Assistance was a fast-paced read. There were several grammatical errors, but nothing that truly slows you down. Sci-Fi fans will love the technology described in the book. Lots of details regarding tele-porting, robotics, and communication fill the pages. There was very little violence involved in this revolution, which makes it so much easier to cheer the underdogs on.

I would have liked to see the characters a little more developed, and possibly a few more insights from the side of Sordius Maxis, but overall, it was a light, enjoyable read. (Review by Charlie - A Literary R&R review team member)… (más)